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Thursday, May 12, 2005

Underground Masker (Stand on the Right please) Tube Challenge Song

Listen and Enjoy

A very large file welcomed me this morning in my in-box, but it was well worth it. Not sure how many of you know that the next
Zone 1 Underground Tube Challenge takes place on the 20th of May. Obviously Geoff n Neil will be taking part, but other regulars to this blog including the .....how shall I say it..........slightly deranged .........Dust man Anthony Smith. Anthony has penned a magnificant song in honour of the occasion. Underground Masker Stand On The Right Please (District Line Dub) - It's a long download but go for it - you'll be humming the catchy riff for the next hour.

In case you fancy singing along (or you haven't got headphones in the office), here's the lyrics:

"Welcome to Tube Challenge Club
It's the District Line Dub!

Come Tube running with the Underground bandits!
Bring a mask and a packet of biscuits
Bring your log book
Bring your plasters
I'm the man, King Challenge, the Zone One MASTER!
The blaster!
The Master Masker!
Compared to me there's nobody faster!
I'm on a Tube race, I won't mess around
That's why you're on the surface and I'm underground!

COMIN' AT YA!
On a Jubilee train!
Stanmore to Baker Street's the route in my brain
I'm the Theydon Bois boy, I'm the Ruislip Ragamuffin
Snoop Grenny Greenwich, gonna knock out your stuffin'
From Edgware to Epping, that's what I do
I'm on a Tube Challenge, I'm telling you!
COMIN' AT YA!
Changing lines with my expertise!
Escalator tourists, stand on the right please!

Chorus:

(Tube challenge) Stand on the right please
(Tube challenge) Get out the way. x4

Doooown in the deep-level, what do I see?
A Bakerloo driver who's looking right up at me.
I say "What?" I say "What?" I say "Queens Park?"
H&W's the stop-for-me
I'm the champ'ian!
The Marylebone man!
If I don't do all stations then nobody can
I need Wembley!
I'm the Zone D Thunderer and
You, Mr. Driver, are a Bakerloo blunderer!

A big white train comin' up from the GROUND
I write in the logbook as I travel northbound
I run overground
From Ickenham to Ruislip
And head down to Heathrow international flight-strip
A Guinness World Record is what I need
It's all just a question of running at speed
It's all just a question of travelling with ease
So 'scuse me, out the way, stand on the right please.

CHORUS

When your train's on time and you're ahead for a while
Smile, smile, smile, it's an Underground trial
But if the train's late,
Keep your head straight,
And take the first service from Notting Hill Gate
I'm a focused machine when the signal turns green
I can cross platforms quicker than you could ever dream
Like a beast released from Aldgate East,
For the sake of the record, stand on the right please!

CHORUS ad nauseam
"

Cheers Anthony. It's a classic.


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