The following is from one of my colleagues at work who does a similar journey home to me:
"My girlfriend and I were travelling back home on the Piccadilly Line. I was a Saturday afternoon so not too busy, but loads of couples, some kids and a bunch of girls. We were standing by the doors and my girlfriend was trying to attract my attention by tapping me in the side with her water bottle...
Being a bloke, I didn't pick up straight away, but when I finally turned around. She made look at the guy about a metre away in the middle of the carriage. He looked a bit dopey and I couldn't work out what the fuss was about until I looked down..
The guy was wearing some grimy trackie bottoms and had what can best be described, before watershed, as a baguette at half mast poking inside his trousers! He was pretty obviously going commando!
It was hilarious/distressing/disturbing all at once! Almost like he was wearing something as a joke. But he just stood there and stared at people then sat down opposite the poor girls and arranged himself.
The funny thing was everybody had noticed but everyone was making up conversations (rhubarb rhubarb rhubarb...) and trying to avoid eye contact.
I'm not sure if this guy was all there... or whether he was actually a pervert.
He was very scruffy and obviously had taken zero measures to cover up what nature had obviously "blessed" him with. I wonder if the Tube keep files on people like that if reported?"
I'm sure they probably do. Not long ago FridayCities reported a man who was doing some pretty unsavory things with his trouser snake into a copy of Metro. The reporter said "I sent this as a letter to The Metro as I know they like to hear nice stories of people sharing their paper, using it to mop up spills etc. Unfortunately they did not see fit to publish it."