Just a tad worrying

I don't think it matters whether it was an Iraqi or not but how on earth did someone manage to get into London Underground tunnels at 3am two weeks ago (but it only hit the papers today)



London District secretary of the RMT union said "We are concerned that any unauthorised person should have access to the tracks - particularly at that hour. There would have been time to have hidden anything

We have demanded security checks for those who work on the system but this has not been done. There are subcontractors who wander around without identification"

An LU spokesman said "The safety and security of London Underground is our top priority. Immediately an individual was found in the tunnel he was escorted from the track and questioned by the British Transport Police. The track was searched and nothing was found".

Check out The Standard for more on this

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, May 04, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/05/just-tad-worrying.html

Yahoo Pick of the Day

Cheers Yahoo

Blimey my blog's made it to a Yahoo Pick of the Day for the 1st May, add that to the time when my main site was a Yahoo Pick of the Week (years ago - October 2000) all I can say is Yahoooooooooo

Here's what they said if you don't want to click on the link:

British people love to talk about the weather, it's a fact, and thankfully the crazy weather recently has given us plenty to talk about. In London, however, there is one thing which people love to talk about more than the weather and that is the Tube. Luckily, successive governments have realised the importance of Tube conversations to the general population of London and have striven to make sure that it never works properly. Today's Pick, the London Underground Tube Diary, is a blog about travelling on the Tube daily. The writing is pretty good and the site informative and amusing. So, if you have to cram into the world's grumpiest sardine cans every morning you may well appreciate Tube Diaries' take on commuting.

Not much blogging for the next few days though as it's a Bank Holiday on Monday in the UK - Yahoooooooo (again) and as the pick said - we've had some crazy weather just to coincide with it.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Sunday, May 02, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/05/yahoo-pick-of-day.html

Ken on the Tube

He DOES use the Tube

This isn't going to be a post about Ken Livingstone talking about the Tube - although doubtless he will be this evening in the State of London Debate, but it's me spotting Ken himself on the Tube.

We've recently moved offices and I now have the most God awful journey to get from Richmond to Barbican or Old Street. It's a mare. Today I changed at Gloucester Road to get the Circle line going clockwise. I discovered a few days ago that a platform map reckons there's only about a minute or so difference to get to the Barbican going anticlockwise. I'm not convinced, but am still in experimental mode, so did it.

I'm slightly tired and hungover, so wasn't really paying a lot of attention to anything, but at Westminster I saw a bloke with a standard issue beige raincoat and traditional umbrella, legging it for the tube. "That's Ken Livingstone", I thought, as he got onto the next carriage. This was confirmed by a handful of other people making the same connection as me and looking at him.

This was too good an opportunity to miss for a tube celeb spot, so I moved along my carriage and amazingly he was sitting a couple of seats away from me in the next carriage. It definitely was Ken, as regular visitors may remember that me and Mecca met him last year and had a chat with him. Hardly anyone in his carriage gave the mayor any attention or showed signs of recognition, apart from a guy standing up reading his report on London Transport over Ken's shoulder.

My first picture was a disaster, as waiting for the train to stop, just as I was about to snap, a woman reached over for a Metro and her arm was exactly in front of Ken's face.



Second picture is better, but it is through two panes of glass. Oh yeah, he got off at Blackfriars.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 29, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/ken-on-tube.html

A little bit of culture

Arts at Gloucester Road

Gloucester Road (well the District and Circle line bit of it) has always been known as a place where art is displayed in little alcoves along the platform walls. But yesterday as I came back from a meeting there, I heard classical music being played in the ticket area as I went through the barriers.

No buskers around and it was way too good to be a busker anyway. Me and another guy were looking round and staring at the ceiling to see where the sound was coming from. Hardly anyone else looked remotely concerned, particularly a couple of station assistants chatting in the corner.

It was about 11.30, and not many people about, but I certainly didn't notice it when I went steaming through the station and a few hours before. So I asked the station assistant who it was. He didn't know and said "It's just a compilation one of the guys has done from his computer - there's no label on it"

So yet another mystery. It was definitely a piano concerto, something like Satie but definitely not as contemporary. But whatever it was quite soothing, perhaps it will catch on at other stations.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 29, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/little-bit-of-culture.html

The things people talk to their partners about

What's unique about Mile End (or Liverpool Street) and how many one unders are there?

Two very weird conversations taking place between boyfriend and girlfriend, strangely both emailed to me today - (have I missed "Have a conversation about the tube with your partner Day"?)

Konstantin from www.londonleben.co.uk emailed me with the following query:

"I overheard a conversation last night - in the tube of course. A guy said to his girlfriend "Apparently there is only one station, where you can start a journey and reach every other tube station by changing trains once only. It's Mile End."

I'm not sure about that. I believe it would work for King's Cross and Liverpool Street as well. Was he just showing off? I spent an hour today on the tube, checking the tube map and I still don't know."

I tended to agree with Konstantin in that it works for Liverpool Street too. King's Cross is a no no, as although it is the station with the most lines running through it, you would have to change twice to get onto the Waterloo and City Line. Anyone any other views?

Also in a fit of morbidity Rachel asked "How many people fall under tubes per year? How many are suicides and how many are accidents?

I reckon about one a week, and my boyfriend reckons one a day. Any idea?".

I could help Rachel by finding out from tubeprune that tube driver District Dave reckons there are about 100 suicides a year. A report on the tube's website from March 2003 says there were only 9 non suicide fatalities that year - or one per 100 million customer journeys.

And I've no idea where I found this out originally but 11am is the peak hour for tube suicides and Victoria and King's Cross the most "popular" stations for them - originally from my tube facts page.

Now I hope the couples go back to arguing about more normal things like who's going to put the bins out.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 27, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/things-people-talk-to-their-partners.html

I am not obsessed with men's underwear

I am not obsessed with men's underwear

If I repeat it often enough it will become true. And I can't help it if men send me in pictures of their boxer shorts and likewise I can't help it if men insist on flashing their Calvins to everyone on the Tube.



I never knew men wore colour co-ordinated knickers before. I can't say I have ever, ever, worn a pair of kecks to deliberately match my belt.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, April 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/i-am-not-obsessed-with-mens-underwear.html

Today's Metro Momento

Heartbreak at Hither Green

It's the last Monday in the month and the day when Metro try to play Cupid and match commuters who fancy other commuters. Maybe this month's lot are getting more into Lonely Hearts than others I've seen, or maybe the people who make up letters in Metro are coming over all Mills & Boon. This one, from the poetically named Allegra, is a classic:

"Surrounded by Japanese tourists, you were reading John Lennon's Definitive Biography, and my heart went boom. It was the 5.49pm train from Charing Cross to Orpington. When you sat down, you seemed annoyed at the noise being made by the guys behind you. It made me look at you again and if there is such a thing as a thunderbolt of love - I got it. My heart swelled and I couldn't move. I saw you looking at me in the reflection of the window but our eyes only met once and I thought my chest would explode. When I got off at Hither Green, I turned to look back at you and you were doing the same. When you saw me your face broke out into the most beautiful smile. I'm just sorry I didn't give you my number. I'm also sorry because I haven't seen you again because I have looked for you every day since."

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, April 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/todays-metro-momento.html

It's Temple

Only station name on the London Underground that's also on the Paris Metro

There you go for all people who may be looking for this answer for a quiz - someone emailed me today and it's one of those things I have stored in my head (for pub quizzes and the like). I was surprised it wasn't easier for Rupert to find through Google than having to come to me first. But I think you would have to already know that it was Temple in order to find the answer.

Ask Jeeves comes up with it if you don't actually ask the question and just input: "station paris metro and london underground", but for once Google lets you down and I think you'd have to try quite a few search combinations (without Temple obviously) to find the answer.

Well perhaps not any more, if Google now sends people this way.

Oh, if anyone wants proof - Temple is on the Circle and District Line of the Tube and on the romantically named Line 3 of the Metro.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, April 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/its-temple.html

Summer in London

Summertime and the tubes are buggered

Circle Line completely out of action today. District Line only running to Earl's Court - but hey the sun was shining, as witnessed by the piccie below:



Still didn't put people in a cheerful enough mood to give any dosh to the accordian player on my carriage - I bet he thought he was onto a winner.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, April 24, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/summer-in-london.html

Fighting Fat at Glamoursmith

I've just come back from a ginormous veggie meal at The Gate in Hammersmith (according to Metro, Alicia Silverstone's favourite restaurant in London) and feel like Monty Python's Mr Creosote, so thought it was kinda appropriate to see a really slim woman reading a book about how to Fight Fat After 40 at Glamoursmith.



Why is it mainly slim people who read dieting books, or is this a myth and I just think that it's only slim people who read dieting books? I was tempted to ask her for a copy as (fooking ell) I will be 40 later this year. She didn't look remotely 40 though so I'm hoping she was just reading for research purposes. Hopefully, she would have said to me "Why you don't look almost 40 yourself either, surely you are just asking me to get a story for your blog, and stop taking pictures of me you mad stalking woman".

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, April 24, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/fighting-fat-at-glamoursmith.html

Coke Bottles on Film and Boxers Shorts

What will you send in next?

I can't believe I get a number of emails from people sending me various bits and bobs and stories and jpgs and stuff after reading something from the blog. It's really sweet of you all and it's nice to know that my journey is having some sort of effect on other people's commutes or thoughts on the tube.

Asten sent me in a movie of the Coke bottles getting on the tube at Piccadilly Circus (yes you read that correctly even though I thought I was mad when I first saw them in January)



And Ian Dolby finally found those boxer shorts with Shepherds Bush on the front that he'd been waxing lyrical about for ages.



However they didn't have Arsenal on the back of them although he said:

"No Arsenal on the back - but I did say that was a rumour as I hadn't opened the packet. You could also get "Wapping" on the front but modesty (and some would say the Trades' Description Act) prevented me. Actually, Wapping would probably have been a more appropriate rear-printed slogan for the group of American sounding tourists in front of me."

Also thanks to commenting stalwart Bradley for sending me a link to his report of the car that drove onto the District Line yesterday at Kew and screwed up the service between Richmond and Turnham Green for half a day. Fortunately I listen to Capital Radio in the mornings and I heard about it and timed my journey so I could go on by British Snail instead.

Cheers guys much appreciated.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 23, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/coke-bottles-on-film-and-boxers-shorts.html

Today's Metro Momento

Why we see red over "I'm on the train" calls

Researchers at York Uni have clearly nothing to do as they've carried out a study on why we find other people's mobile phone conversations irritating. It's nothing to do with the loudness of people saying "I'm on the tube" or "I'm just going into a tunnel" - apparently it's because we don't know what the person on the other end is saying.



The photo above was originally from TubePrune's site and was taken by Donald McGarr.

"What really drives millions of Britons mad is simply, they normally only hear one side of the conversation. 'Conversations only work if there is a general agreement. There is a need to understand what is said and to talk back' said Professor Andrew Monk.

His team exposed 64 people (huge sample - WTF are universities doing?) waiting for a bus or on a train to a staged discussion - half on mobiles and half face to face - at different volumes. In all cases, the phone conversations annoyed volunteers more".

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 22, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/todays-metro-momento_22.html

Move along the platform

More or less effective than the mime artists?

After coming back to work from a meeting I noticed that Vauxhall had a much more obvious way of telling people to move down the platform



Oi, it's less crowded you idiots, so don't congregate around the platform near the entrance, move up to the front (or indeed the back) of the train and you may well get a seat.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 22, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/move-along-platform.html

The tube have a new band

I thought this was a spoof ad

Or one of those ads that was meant to warn us that doing something or other on the tube - walking slowly, talking, smiling, breathing causes delays.



But apparently there is a real band called "The Delays" - the tube really ought to sponsor them.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 22, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/tube-have-new-band.html

Train Tourette's Syndrome

Bless his little cotton socks

On the way to yet another expo today I was standing on the District Line (delays at Kings Cross seemed to have screwed up the whole system) and a little boy in a blue school uniform was munching away on a dairylea and ham cracker sarnie and playing up. When laying on his mother didn't work or bumping into her, he started to recite the names of random train stations - "Sunbury, Addlestone, Staines, Aldgate East, Turnham Green". "Shut up or I'll tell your teacher," his mum said, much to my relief. After all who'd want their son to grow up to be a PA system.

However, in a strange echo of the guy who found offence about the London Marathon Adidas ad in last week's Metro with lots of swear words in it, including "twat", the little boy took a sudden interest in his mum's Metro. So said at top of his voice - "Look they're naked". I looked from my superior standing position and it was some sort of "art" with a picture of two tailor's dummies.

Many thanks to Green Fairy for blogging The Sun's outrage at the London marathon ad:

Rob, of Sheffield, South Yorks, told The Sun: "I was reading it on a break and suddenly I saw the word 't**t'. Imagine the embarrassment of a mum whose six-year-old son is asking her what a 't**t' is?"

Green Fairy said "It's someone who rings up a tabloid newspaper to complain about a mildly rude word appearing in advert in a newspaper only given out first thing in the morning to commuters in case a child somewhere in the country with reading skills far advanced of their age should stumble somehow upon a copy, pick out that word from all the others and march up to their mother in the middle of a church social demanding their childhood innocence be stolen away with an immediate etymological definition, darling."



There's no way this particular little boy would have been able to have read the words on this ad - most five or six year olds are really bored with small type as they find it too difficult to read, but I'm sure he'd have more to say about the half naked women in The Sun, like the "naked" people in Metro. It also took me about twenty minutes to find the offending t word. It'll be easier for you as there's only a small section above, but imagine this as a double page spread.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, April 21, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/train-tourettes-syndrome.html

Dot matrix on your desktop

Bakerloo Line users can experience the delights of a tube platform indicator on their desktop

With Tubetrack you can download a little program which sits on your desktop, so you can see when the next three tube trains are supposedly due to arrive at your chosen station.

Hopefully the platform indicators don't include some of the rather random platform indicators I saw a couple of days ago.

Have a look at the tube ETA (estimated time of arrival) website it's based on.

Many thanks to Ralf and Matt who sent me the link to this within four minutes of each other. Cheers guys.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 20, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/dot-matrix-on-your-desktop.html

God, some people are cheerful

Strange Google referrers

I very rarely blog my search engine referrals, but in the last 24 hours, there seem to have been some particularly weird people who came to this blog after looking for the following items - sadly they will be sort of disappointed:

pictures of animals going mad because of trains - that'll be those pesky horses in the tube tunnels - Google think this blog is top - literally - on that one

london marathon 2004 fatalities (how could this blog be the 1st entry?) - fortunately, as far as I know, this year no one died.

pest control london underground - sort of brings up a reference to those pesky horses again - however most of the pests on the Tube are blokes who sit with their legs apart (far more annoying to me than women, myself included, putting on some slap - although it obviously winds some people up)

Great, I also have a stalker - looking for Annie April 2004

And scarily Rob Brydon will now know I've been stalking him

I'll end with my number two slot for "blog people captured by zombies trying to escape"

Fantastic, yet scary. Google I love ya!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 20, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/god-some-people-are-cheerful.html

Rhinos on the tube

Congrats to all the marathon runners

It's the first time I've ever been to see the London Marathon in the flesh, and it was quite strange being on the Tube with lots of soaking wet people wrapped in tin foil cloaks wearing strange medallions round their necks (Jimmy Saville in a sauna would have felt at home). Tourists must have wondered WTF was going on, but when they left and saw the streets covered in rhinos, santas, fairies, policemen and firemen in shorts and people dressed as chickens, eggs and toilets they must have finally realised that the Brits are as eccentric as they originally thought.

On the way back, one of the runners, who had fortunately managed to get a seat (you try standing on the tube after running 26.2 miles) was telling his friends about his outward journey and the usual delays, but the driver had tried to lighten things up by saying "Well, at least the delay wasn't caused by a rhino getting stuck in the doors."



I was sort of tempted to grab one of the discarded foil cloaks from a bin and fashion a medal for myself, as all marathon runners got free travel on the Tube today. But I looked pretty much like a sodden, bedraggled, bag lady already, without rummaging in bins too.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Sunday, April 18, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/rhinos-on-tube.html

Elephant and Gibberish

The next train is for safdkladshlghlkahgi

OK I know I've been manning an exhibition stand for four days. I can hardly think straight, talk straight or walk straight but it looks like they were really taking the piss with the platform indicators at Piccadilly Circus this evening (Bakerloo Line, southbound for those who care)



Still Elephant & Castle is one of the station names where out of towners and tourists are most likely to think "You're having a laugh aren't you?" so maybe they thought no one would notice.



(To see the best full scan of this map check out Geoff (tube challenge guy) Marshall's link).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, April 17, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/elephant-and-gibberish.html

Where I've been for the last three days

Another DLR day tomorrow

The prospect of riding on more driverless trains beckons tomorrow as I head off to Excel for the last time this week. I actually saw Richard Herring (comedian and big time blogger) on Wednesday and from my stand said "Richard Herring" in a way designed to sound as though I personally knew him. Apart from having had a little banner to his sponsorship page on this blog for quite some time, there's no reason at all for him to know who I am. But bless him, he stopped, as you would, I suppose, if some woman shouted out like a long lost friend. And we had a brief chat, also with his mate Tony Gardner, who now actually looked more familar than his sponsorship page picture.

However, Richard Herring's blog entry from Wednesday summed up my experience of the last three days much more adequately than I could, so here's a bit:

"The Docklands Light Railway was packed with men who looked more like the traditional image of the ostrich: very thin with wide staring eyes (whether through fear or obsession only they could tell you) and no cakes or ale in sight. They were clutching their Marathon magazines, as if in some scenario where they had arranged to meet on a blind date and used that as a means of recognition, only to arrive at the appointed hour to find everyone in the place has a Marathon magazine. "

The rest in context is here.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, April 17, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/where-ive-been-for-last-three-days.html

Today's Metro Momento

Another "Eats Shoots and Leaves" moment

For some unknown reason Metro had a little box on etiquette - it was fairly tongue in cheek - not being the last person in an email exchange, not putting on your auto "out of office" reply when going to lunch.... etc, etc. It did have a piece of Tube etiquette for men (Christ knows why it was men only) asking them to "give up seats for pregnant and elderly women".

I never thought that elderly women could get pregnant. Unless their definition of elderly is women in their late forties.

Fortunately, on my long train journey to Docklands this morning, I noticed that the North London Link guys got it right, with a sign saying (not asking) to - "give up your seat for a pregnant or elderly person".

Wonder why you never see signs like this on the Tube? Probably cos the head honchos at the Tube are worried about having another grammatical quandry or can't quite cope with the image that would go with it and, like the Japanese, know it would be open to mass spoofing, general confusion or a barrage of letters in Metro.





For more on giving up seats see the tube etiquette section on goingunderground.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 16, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/todays-metro-momento_15.html

Dogs must be carried......

Yeah right

Just try carrying this one



Fantastic picture sent to me from Frank Timmer from www.deutschedoggenfans.de.

For more on one of my favourite signs on the tube - check out this entry.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 15, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/dogs-must-be-carried.html

Two rare pictures from me

You won't see these blogged too often

I had to get up at the crack of dawn to get to an exhibition in the Docklands this morning, so got a rare picture of a full stack of Metro's at Richmond station - there's normally none or only a few left when I get there. (The eagle eyed will see the normal delays on the District Line)



Also, due to the Silverlink train I wanted being cancelled I had to get the DLR and I know you won't believe it, but the only seat available was one at the front of the train. So, in full trainspotter mode, below is a view of tracks from the driver's vantage point. Remember DLR trains don't have drivers and are operated automatically, so it gives you the perfect opportunity to sit in the front seat and pretend to drive the train if you're that way inclined.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 15, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/two-rare-pictures-from-me.html

Top Tube Ad

How would your boyfriend react on the tube?

Penguin do some top ads for some of their books and the one below which I saw at Piccadilly Circus today, asks us, as chicks, to see how we'd react to certain situations on the tube, to decide if our man needed training.



You should be able to see the questions in red but just in case you can't see the answers........ (my comments in brackets)

Your partner is staring at a woman's bare midriff opposite, what do you do?

a) pinch his fat leg till his eyes water and the girl will see what a pansy he is (nice option)
b) pull your own top up and breathe in hard (to achieve what?)
c) move to another carriage until he realises he's in trouble (not worth it you probably wouldn't get a seat)

In the rush hour a total stranger blatantly strokes your bum, how do you expect your bloke to react?

a) with a wink and a smile and a little rub of his own (which is only likely to turn the stranger on)
b) by pretending to read the map above (that would be a fairly natural yet cowardly thing to do)
c) by leaving your groper in no doubt that when the train stops, he'd better mind the gap (ex hubby would have definitely done that)

So I'd have been in a quandry with ex needing slight training.

I'm sure this ad will lead to more than a fair few arguments in itself, if couples read it together on a platform.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 13, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/top-tube-ad.html

Unnerving driver's announcement

How to put the willies up several hundred people in twenty seconds

I still get pleasantly surprised about how much traffic I get from my main site, Going Underground being an FHM recommended site (if you're from outside the UK or don't look at magazines with well endowed ladies on them, it's a best selling lads' mag - and a monthly not like those ridiculous new weeklies Zoo, Nuts, Balls and Bollocks or whatever), particularly as some of the blokes from FHM come up with the best overheard tube drivers' announcements.

Here's one from an FHM.com visitor who signed my guestbook over the weekend:

"Apparently one year at Christmas a tube driver decided to have some fun, stopped the train in the middle of a tunnel, and said in a deep voice, "This is your driver speaking...(pause)...or is it?" What a man! "

What a psycho!

Update - just in case you don't read the comments (shame on you)

Looks like this driver (Redd Pepper), or someone like him has now got a job as a voiceover artist. LordofMisrule gives us the full story.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 13, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/unnerving-drivers-announcement.html

Listening on the Tube

Participants required - Sounds of the Underground

If anyone is up for this, there's a genuine request to take part in research for someone's PHD. Ximena (top name) originally left a message in comments a few weeks ago and I followed up the enquiry. I've simply cut and paste part of Ximena's follow-up email below, so that I don't get anything wrong:

"I am doing my PhD in Music, Technology and Innovation at De Montfort University in Leicester. My research is about the sound world or soundscape of the London Underground and what people would remember of it, we might call it cultural or collective auditory memory. I need for the sample 30 volunteers from diverse backgrounds.

This is a cultural and artistic project opened to all ages. The conditions to participate in the project are: to be a commuter (this is to have a routine travelling by The Tube at any time, line and route), and also to be Internet user or to be attracted by technology.

First, I need to have a chat with volunteers either in May or June. I am arranging appointments for it. In the next academic year (starting in September 2004), I will need a bit more of their time for a practical exercise of listening and sonic creation."

Anyone interested please email Ximena Alarcon to find out more.



I'll be too busy listening to my toons to take part, but it might be quite fun if you want to have a go.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, April 10, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2004/04/listening-on-tube.html

Good Friday

A Friday that's Good cos you're not on the tube

Hoorah - two week days with no commuting. Actually on Wednesday morning I realised I wasn't a real commuter. I travel in from so far out of London that I usually get a seat at the start of my journey - this is as rare as rocking horse shit for people who live in zone 2 - from where I started my journey on Wednesday morning after a sleepover at my friend's house.

From West Hampstead to Charing Cross (not my usual route at all) which involved one change on auto pilot at Baker Street (always follow the changeover instructions of a local, even if the tube map and your better instincts say change at Finchley Road) and eight stops (about twenty minutes), I did not get a seat. It felt really, really wrong.

I usually put my make up on, on the tube. You can't put your make up on when strap hanging - take my word for it, it's impossible.

I usually read a left over Metro from the seat of a District Line. Discarded Metro's here were left on the little ledges behind people's backs and seats and it was too crowded to do the yoga required to twist my arm back on itself and get one.

No chance of some of my usual nosy photography, without taking a picture of the pores of someone's skin or the fibres of their coat.

I thanked the Lord Sony for inventing walkmans, mp3 mans, discmans or any other portable device with man at the end, as my music provided my only piece of sanity.

I seriously don't know how real commuters do this every bloody work day. God bless them, every one (ooops wrong holiday - Happy Hot Cross Bun eating - and a hip hoppy Easter Greeting found through The Big Smoker).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 09, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Getting their money's worth

Mime artists doing overtime

Yep, the Tube are saving us bit of dosh here with using the same mime artists for their "Please pass along the platform" ad. It's basically the same principle as the "Please pass along the carriage" ad and the same sentiment of there not being an invisible wall which prevents people from moving down the platform or the carriage.

And no, the mime artists aren't recoiling in terror at the invasion of the touchy blue Oystercard posters (although you cannot move on the tube without seeing them).



The poster says it's dangerous. It is. If you're unsure about the danger, just imagine some manic commuters like me legging it for the train they know they're getting on, come hell or High Street Kensington. And they'll bash into you like an unstoppable force meeting an all too movable object. As they know you're likely to be a tourist or a bunch of tourists standing round there aimlessly wondering whether you're really going southbound or northbound, or why there isn't an Oxford Street station, or with all the Circuses, why there isn't a station called London Zoo.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, April 08, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Fish and Parcels and Sweets

Long journey home

Libran dilemma at Piccadilly Circus last night. Bakerloo to Waterloo then British Snail. Or the Dilly to Glamoursmith (Hammersmith) then District Line (Fish and Parcels Line) home. The normally helpful boards at the top of the escalators said a few delays on the District so I head to Bakerloo.

Why the fook the helpful boards didn't say that Waterloo station had been evacuated and that no trains were stopping there, Lord only knows.

So I got off at Embankment and took the District Line back to Richmond. It took the longest time ever. But was reading Smoke and listening to my chillout toons so didn't really think at all about the stops between stops and the extra long stops at stops.

Did however notice a woman opposite me with a tweed coat and a matching tweed handbag nestling, cameleon like, in her lap, who ate an entire packet of Opal Fruits (sorry, Starburst or whatever they're called now) non stop, while staring into space.

I was once on the tube with my friend who did exactly the same with a packet of wine gums. I waited till she got to the end of the packet, which took under two minutes, and said "Thanks for the wine gum Shazzer" (I am Bridget Jones of the Tube I really do have a friend called Shazzer). She simply hadn't noticed that she "chain smoked" her confectionary too.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, April 06, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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I'm no Robert Doisneau

Snogging on the tube

Was out in Kew Gardens with a friend yesterday and he asked me what my take on snogging on the tube was. "It doesn't really bother me", I replied "as I'm usually doing something else". (That's so not meant to sound like that - I meant I'm normally reading or something) But it reminded me that I had taken a picture over Xmas of a couple snogging on the platform at Angel tube station. I told him that it reminded me of the Robert Doisneau picture - of course I couldn't remember Doisneau's name at the time (let alone pronounce it), so I said "You know the French one, really famous black and white picture".

Anyway, I dug out the picture from the recesses of my digital camera's memory and of course it's nothing like Doisneau's but the sentiment remains similar I think, particularly with the apparent obliviousness of everyone around them.



And how it should be done below:

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, April 05, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Top trainspotters joke

Smoke's out

The fantabulous London fanzine/magazine/peculiar (whatever), Smoke, is finally out in some shops and aside from my mate Mecca's feature about Neil Gaiman's Neverwhere and its parallels to real life on the tube (cheers for the site check) - there's a massive London Transport theme in this issue. Haven't had a chance to read the whole thing, but buses feature very heavily (bus journeys, messages written on steamed up bus windows, disappearing buses, bus of the month - my God, Jag will be in heaven)

Under a "Why Some of London's Best Jokes Aren't Actually Funny" heading we have the following joke and the wonderfully literal explanation as to why it isn't funny, which could have almost been written by some of the people who comment in this blog (you know who you are).

JOKE
'Excuse me driver, is this a Wapping train?'
'No, Madam, it's the same size as all the rest, otherwise it wouldn't fit through the tunnels.'

WHY IT ISN'T FUNNY (you need to adopt a purposefully nasal voice when saying this and get out a flash of tea)
"Because the tunnels on the East London Line are actually built to more generous proportions than most on the underground system, in order to accommodate full-size rolling stock."

By the way, don't take my word for Smoke's excellence. Diamond Geezer, who highlighted its existence to me in the first place, is still waxing lyrical about it.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 02, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Speaking of Italians (I was just a bit earlier)

Don't panic

Had lunch the other day, with my friend who runs www.isthisyou.co.uk (the brill reuniting people back with their lost photos site), and he's just remembered that he forget to tell me the following story:

"Do you remember the big powercut last August?

When the lights went out I was travelling around the Circle line somewhere outside Sloane Square, with two Italian women I'd met on holiday. It was their first trip to London. And, probably, their last.

As the power failed and the driver explained patiently what was happening, the general attitude in the cariage was what you'd expect -- one of resigned boredom. A few gentle tuts. Newspapers being shuffled (the emergency lights were on). A few people tried their mobiles, realised there was nothing doing, and settled back into their Robert Ludlum novels.

Not my travelling companions though. The barrage of questions started immediately.

"What's happening?"
There's no power.

"How long will be be stuck for?"
I don't know.

"Ten minutes? An hour? Ten hours?"
I don't know. The driver will tell us when he knows.

"Does anyone know we're down here? Shall I call the police?"
Yes. No.

"Can we get out and walk?"
No.

"Why not?"
Because if the power comes back on, you'll get killed.

"Can we talk to the driver?"
If you want to, but he's just said he doesn't know what's happening.

"Will someone come and rescue us"
Yes, if it comes to that.

The questions went on, and at rising levels of hysteria, for twenty tortuous minutes. When the power came back on at last, my companions wept. They hugged each other, hugged me, hugged the bemused Albanian lawyer opposite. They danced. They sang. They laughed hysterically. They videoed each other to record the moment of their escape from this subterranean nightmare. All to the bemusement of all the other passengers -- and to my increasing mortification, I'm sorry to say.

Longest twenty minutes of their lives? It was definitely the longest twenty minutes of mine. And they haven't been back to London since."

I love the fact that they had to video their survival. But their behaviour would have had me crawling up the walls with vicarious worry.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 02, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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My Own Private Dungeon

Full Scream Ahead

Thereisnospoon asked me if I'd seen the new ads for the London Dungeon which compared their new ride to a journey on the tube. I hadn't until last night.



The text and drawing look as they were produced by Gerald Scarfe and I knew I'd be unable to get a clear shot, specially as I was surrounded by loud Italians calling me a photographer (yep my Italian's rubbish, but any fool could work out they'd spotted my less than candid snaps of the ad) so here's what it says:

"If you think that being squashed together buttock to buttock, armpit to nose, hurtling through putrid rat infested tunnels is bad, go back 300 years and get a trouser wetting, heart pumping feel of what it was really like to be punished as a traitor. We'll shove you on a boat ride to HELL. You'll be screaming to get back on The Tube."

Almost faultless copy. Top marks.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, April 02, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Poker faced

Would you want to sit opposite me?

Yesterday morning, I was sitting opposite another person in front of one of those pointy ads for Pacific Poker and I wasn't following the ad and contemplating how greedy the person opposite me was. More of my thoughts were focussed on how much of a spy I would make, or whether I had a poker face.



You need a poker face for taking secretive pictures, particularly when the people are sitting opposite you. I'm currently reading Paul Auster's "The Music of Chance" which is about poker players and gamblers (well it is so far - please don't let me know how it ends if you've already read it - or watched the film). I love Paul Auster, he writes in such an effortless conversational way ("I've figured these mugs out, I'm so on top of it I can tell what cards they're holding just by looking at their eyes") and yet there's substance and form and thought to it.

Tobacco was a useful prop, and it helped to prevent his opponents from watching him too closely, as if he could literally hide his thoughts behind a cloud of smoke. The important thing is to remain inscrutable, to build a wall around yourself and not let anyone in.

Sound advice for me as a "commuting spy" (although not with all the no smoking signs around) but surely building a wall around one's self is what most people do on the tube, so no wonder I can spy fairly easily. Perhaps I should take up poker too.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, March 31, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Photo shopping

The security ad mentioned earlier has had some top photo shopping and I love the way that London Transport have been having a photoshopping frenzy with the ad below for the London Marathon



If you are running the marathon and have the actual leaflet for this you can almost see the joins. Good luck to anyone taking part in the marathon in a couple of weeks and maybe do some practice by seeing if you can outrun some tubes. Should be pretty easy on some lines.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, March 30, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Very "Eats, shoots and leaves"

Yep, even the Economist have picked up on various commas being in wrong place on the tube security poster



"Posters plastered over the London Underground after the Madrid bombings seemed oddly keen to encourage natural British reticence rather than vigilance. They may, of course, have been planted by punctuation zealots to illustrate to the grammatically lazy the importance of using commas and semi-colons correctly."

I can just see the author of Eats, Shoots and Leaves either getting out her valium or calling her agent for another book deal.

Nice to know that Quin in the comments here spotted the same a few days ago.

Thanks for your email, Mike, showing that it's made it to the Economist too.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, March 30, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Have you seen this jumper?

Underground clothing

Hoorah, I am now one proud owner of the London Underground sweater below, complete with its name tag for me to write my name on and reinforced elbow pads and two little holes at nipple height.



I cannot possibly say how I came across this jumper, but nothing illegal was involved and as much as I may have wanted to knock the hat off LU station assistants sometimes, I've never wanted to rip their jumpers off.

I haven't quite worked out what to do with the jumper yet although I was given several suggestions by the person who gave it to me - fashion it into a vodoo dummy or make into a punch bag, or turn it into a cushion for a subway tush, or - heavens forbid - try to pose as a member of tube staff with it. Ah decisions, decisions.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, March 27, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Happy days are here again

Front page of The Standard

Also at the platform kiosk at the brighter than bright, whiter than white newly painted Glamoursmith (the brightness was almost hurting my eyes).



According to The Standard we're in for entire shut down of certain lines including the District and the Circle line for major repair works. In a great toss up, we either have the lines shut down for four days at a time over a few weeks or, shut down for a whole week, in the hope that the work will be finished at once.

"At present contractors are attempting to carry out running repairs during the normal night closure and at weekends but this is causing problems as the work overruns cause chaos in the morning rush hour. " said The Standard.

In a rare moment of insight, the chief exec of one of the firms responsible for the work said this was like "decorating your house by putting up wallpaper one strip at a time." Read the rest and weep.

But as Bradley has eagle eyes and belongs to some transport forum if you look at The Tube's website, it appears that entire District line isn't going to be closed down, just the vast majority of it:

"There will be no Circle line service and no service on the District line from Whitechapel to Earl's Court on Saturday, Sunday and Monday 1-3 May. Saturday and Sunday 8 & 9 and 22 & 23 May, 5 & 6 June, 10 & 11 July, 14 & 15 August, 4 & 5 and 11 & 12 September, 23 & 24 and 30 & 31 October, 20 & 21 November and 4 & 5 December."

There you go, you have been warned.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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More Metro Momentos

The Knowledge

There's a little "off the wall" quiz in today's Metro with a "how well do you know London" Diamond Geezer stylie. Obviously, they had to throw in some questions on the tube and if you'd been studying the 50 fascinating facts about the London Underground from my main site, you'd know the answers to the following questions:

1. Which real life Tube station is a model for the fictional Walford East in EastEnders? (OK, so it's not on my fascinating facts page but it's on Hywel Williams site, referenced from my tube celebs page)

2. As they (sic) appear on the Tube map, only one Underground station has none of the letters of the word 'mackerel' in it. Which one?

3. Only two Tube stations have all vowels in them. Which two?

4. Where in 1924 was Thelma Ursula Beatrice Eleanor the first person born?

Well er, durr. Except she wasn't actually called Thelma Ursula Beatrice Eleanor it was simply an over excited newspaper, and the urban legend stuck. She's actually called Marie Cordery or Eleanor Ashfield depending on which other publication you believe.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Today's morbid Metro Momento

Friday Fun?

The letters page of Metro had a cracking letter about someone's worry if a tube train were bombed and how half the carriage would get out if the driver what at the bombed end (cheerful lot aren't we?)

"......why has no one told us what we should do in an emergency if we find ourselves stuck on a train at the un-bombed out end of the train? Presumably, the only member of staff available to direct us would be the driver. But what happens if they are positioned in the bombed-out end of the train? Should we sit tight and wait to be rescued - and risk choking on fumes or beign crushed in a tunnel collapse? Or should we get the hell out and take our chances on the live rails? And if so, how does one get out of a train that's wedged in a tunnel.

Given that the emergency services have said that rescuing live survivors from this sort of disaster would be almost impossible, it seems pretty poor that there's no information available on board the trains to help us make life-or-death decisions at that 'invevitable' moment"

Well I think Rebecca from SE23 has a point. Will we see emergency "airline style" plastic cards with drawings of people legging it from crashed tube trains? Will there be posters? I know the tube do regular emergency evacuation "rehearsals", (in fact Dave from funkypancake saw some fireman's practice thing going on at the disused Alwych Tube station a few days ago) but I'm not sure what the result of them is. Perhaps someone in the know can let us know.

Co-incendentally Rob from The Big Smoker sent me the link to a poster of the "Who Owns this Bag?" campaign that follows the more common attitude that people have with seeing unattended bags or potential bomb carriers



From mantlepies.com via b3ta.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 26, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Pregnant Pause

Giving up seats

Piccadilly Line shit this morning, so had to get the District Line most of the way in and was reminded of just how hideous it is, with its constant stops between stops. Central Line was also screwed (I left half an hour earlier to prepare for a meeting - got in two minutes before I normally do, fortunately-ish, the person I was meeting was forty minutes late due to the above problems)

But on the District Line I was throwing on some make-up and still managed to see a pregnant woman get on. Now, she wasn't really heavily pregnant and was wearing a thick jacket and a big jumper and for a moment I had that "Is she pregnant or is she just fat?" dilemma. I offered her my seat and fortunately she was pregnant and took the seat - or perhaps she was just fat and thought she might as well take advantage of my offer. (For more seat etiquette)

Doing this always reminds me of the hideous story one of my old bosses told me. A guy was being interviewed by her for a job and it was all going well, until at some deranged point, he said casually "So when are you leaving then?". Old boss looked puzzled. "Er, well you'll be off work soon, won't you?" "Not as far as I know" said old boss. Now at this point the guy should have laid down his shovel and stepped away from the massive hole he was digging. "Well you must be on maternity leave soon". "Er, no". Surprisingly, he never got the job.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, March 24, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Date for your Diary

Who will win the London Transport Awards?

A friend last night asked me if I had been invited to the prestigious first ever London Transport awards taking place tomorrow night (25th March). I hadn't and was hugely affronted. Well I wasn't, as I'd never heard of them. But what a star studded event it promises to be, Sheriff Ken is going to be the after dinner speaker, the fabulous Jon Snow is going to present the awards (I so loved hearing him swear in the Channel 4 ads) and wait for it, Professor David Begg (course you know who he is) is also a co-host. Fantastic.

According to a press release: "The awards recognise and reward excellence in London�s transport sector and like their national counterpart, they focus on progress in the transport arena and reward real improvements to local transport." The awards ceremony starts at 21.45 and finishes at 21.50.

Check out the shortlist - it rox.

I'm so sorry that I missed the chance to vote for my favourite station. It would be a toss up between Kew Gardens (had wonderful plastic flowers for its entire life) because it's the only tube station that more or less has a pub on the platform and Gunnersbury (where I spotted Matthew Stars in Their Eyes Kelly), because out of towners think it's near Arsenal (the Gunners) and it's the station most likely to be confused with a car park.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, March 24, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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'Yoga' comes to the tube

Apparently we have been warned

Monday's Metro momento is usually barking mad and today was no exception as an ex-Estate agent is trying to get us all.....well if you look at the picture below what are we all encouraged to do? Tube pop idol? Hairbrush singing? Sucking our thumbs?



No it's laughter. Well laughter yoga to be exact. "with the threat of terrorism hanging over our journeys, we need an injection of silliness to combat the climate of fear and anxiety". So we all pretend to laugh and it's infectious. Laughter therapy. Not that sort of nervous laughter that sometimes happens. You know the laughter when you've been stuck a bit too long in a tunnel and people think, what fun? This is hysterical. Ha, ha, ha. Anyone who starts laughing in those situations is likely to be carted off in a strait jacket.

But our laughter therapist, Ms Whitehead, continues with her Martin Luther King style wish:

"My dream is that for one day a week, the last carriage of every train becomes a place where you can look people in the eye and get together for a laugh. Perhaps London Underground would be up for it?"

Are you 'aving a laugh mate?

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, March 22, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Top Tube Ad

Invisible Wall

Yesterday, I saw the ad that Jag had mentioned about try to get people to pass down the carriage. It's brill, as this is a particular bugbear of mine, although the mime artists from a distance reminded me of a carriage full of Ronald McDonalds - which would be another nightmare.



The ad tells people that there isn't an invisible barrier stopping them from moving down the carriage and that it's difficult for others to get on if you do this.

Very similar to the 1944 "Please pass down the platform" ad by Fougasse



Love the no nonsense yet slightly philosophical strap line with this forties ad, "The more we are together, the more uncomfortable we'll be".

For more comparisons between 2004 and 1944 check out my post from the 16th March.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, March 20, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Have you heard this busker?

Desparately seeking soothing

As my blog gets loads more returning visitors then my main site, I thought it might be more fruitful to post the following request from my guestbook here. It's a bit of a long shot but you never know.

"I was wondering if anyone can help me. Many years ago (1997-1999), I used to travel to South Kensington station a lot. I remember a woman busker who played a guitar and and really haunting music that echoed all the way down the tunnel. Does anyone know her name?

I did approach her once and wrote her name down, but I've lost the piece of paper a while back now. She told me I could get her music on CD, and now I'm quite desperate to find out what her name is so I can begin to look for it!

Please get in touch with me at sml32@cam.ac.uk if you know who I am talking about! Cheers, Sai"

The South Ken tube interchange used to be one of the most popular spots for buskers as the acoustics is incredible (I think it's even featured in Babara Vine's crime tube novel - King Solomon's Carpet), plus you get loads of people visiting London's major museums on the Cromwell Road there.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 19, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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How 3 minutes becomes 35 minutes on the Tube

Fooking broken down trains on the Dilly Line

I left my flat 3 minutes later than normal this morning and with a hideous saga of missing connections by minutes and a broken train, I ended up being 35 minutes late.

I'm not going into the full boring step by step acccount of my journey, but remember getting to Richmond where I face my usual Libran dilemma every morning. Tube all the way in? Or British Snail to Waterloo, then Bakerloo line to Piccadilly Circus? I ran down the stairs and got through the barrier to see the slow British Snail train just leaving - thought 'shit I have 10 seconds to catch a District Line' which was just about to go, according to the platform indicator display and typically I just missed that too.

Me and another woman had exactly the same thoughts and swore at the same time, except with our age differences I said "Fuck", she said "Poo" and we both rolled our eyes, knowing, we had a six or seven minute wait for the next District Line. The fuck and poo thing really reminded me of that thing going round the net right now - the Channel 4 ad with celebrities saying their favourite swear words - The Tube should do one, they must hear a huge amount of expletives every day.

When I got to Earl's Court on the Piccadilly Line, I realised that more swearing was on the way. We were all sitting in the carriage and nothing happened and I had the massive feeling of deja vu. Except there was a rather worrying alarm bell going on outside for a minute, then switching off, then switching on again. A few more antsy people than me looked out of the still open doors. After five minutes of this, even I was beginning to get antsy. Advanced mumbling over the tannoy by the driver was no help. By his third announcement, he decided to take the cotton wool out of his mouth and leave his Marlon Brando impressions to Alastair McGowan, and we learnt the train wasn't going anywhere due to something at somewhere else.

On the platform a clearer person had been employed to say that there was a defective train at South Ken and the Piccadilly Line was fooked between Kings Cross and Arnos Grove, so for the second day in a row, it was everybody out.

Fuck and poo again.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 19, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Ideas for Tube Fancy Dress Party

Themed London Underground Bash

My friend who sits next to me at work has been invited to a party where you have to dress up as a tube station. This doesn't mean that he would have to wear chicken wire and gaffer tape, or have a load of discarded Metro's sewed onto him, or even cover himself with soot and have the odd mouse popping out of the bottom of his trousers. It's where you dress influenced by the name of a tube station. So with over 260 to choose from you're spoilt for choice.

Two of his friends, so far are going as Ken and Barbie - Barbie-ken (can you see what it is yet?) Barbican. Any more suggestions will be gratefully received.

Update - someone came from Google to this blog after typing in "London Underground fancy dress party", so some people going to the party are obviously doing their homework - check out loads of piccies from a party who had the same theme - a couple of vicars with green wigs and some angels, but everyone else looked remarkably normal - must have been very cryptic with their dress.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, March 18, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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My first security alert since Madrid

Charing Cross Station was closed earlier

Nothing dramatic and everyone treated it like a normal closure. Meant I got on a Bakerloo train at Waterloo, we hung around on the train for a few minutes, then heard that Charing Cross was closed and the Bakerloo Line had been suspended. Hardened commuters and me leapt off the train and went to the Northern Line with not even a second thought and then I got off at Leicester Square (whose roof at escalator level seems to be held together by a load of chicken wire and gaffer tape).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, March 18, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Spaced Out

Ever Felt Like You Were Surrounded by Zombies?

I had to do a double take and actually walk back on myself when leaving Piccadilly Circus today as I thought I saw a poster of a person in a tube carriage surrounded by the undead and extras from Michael Jackson's Thriller video.

I was pleased to not be hallucinating. It was a great London Underground poster for a new "Rom Zom" (romantic zombie - where have you been?) film called Shaun of The Dead. It stars Simon Pegg from the top TV "Sur Com" (surreal comedy) series Spaced and is based on an idea that they introduced in the series - fighting zombies and the living dead in the streets of London.



Not sure how much the Tube will feature in the film itself (if at all) but top poster all the same - and top web address www.romzom.com.

Update

Freaky, freaky, freaky - only two days prior to this fellow blogger funkypancake did a Simon Pegg celeb spot and asked for his piccy which he kindly agreed to.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, March 17, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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In which I remember years ending in four

2004, 1954, 1944

In honour of the boys playing at Twickenham this weekend (they can't do as badly as they did against the Irish), it was quite fitting that I saw a new poster at Glamoursmith about letting people off the train first tonight.

It does seem almost like a rugby tackle getting out of the tube in the rush hour and you feel as though you've left something of yourself behind dragging yourself out.



"Do you think you actually know when your ribs crack?" one of the characters in the short story Confidence Trick written in 1954 said "but on a philosophical note of fair comment rather than complaint".

But as a 21st centry century take the poster's not bad but doesn't convey the sheer shock of seeing how packed a tube can be:



Top poster by Fougasse from 1944.

But, forties, fifties, noughties tube scrummage is still the same.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, March 16, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Bloggies

Thanks to everyone who voted

I didn't win, which is quite frankly no surprise. But I did want to say a big thanks to everyone who did vote for me and I was well pleased to get into the finals for two categories anyway. Amazing, that the voters found books to be sexier than sex, as I was actually pretty staggered that Belle De Jour didn't win the best topical category we were both finalists for. Och well better luck next year and commisserations to The Big Smoker, The Guardian's Blog, Green Fairy and Little Red Boat who were the only blogs in the finals that I read regularly.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, March 16, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Police patrol London Underground

Extra security on the tube

Following the terrorist attack on the trains in Madrid, I've just heard on the radio that the London Underground has rightly responded with an extra show of police (including plain clothes cops) patrolling the tubes and a new poster campaign asking us all to be extra vigilant and on the look out for unattended packages.



For more on this anti terror campaign check out ITN's news page - plus the ever useful Google News.

Update - Excellent response to the "Who Owns this bag" campaign - from what we've come to expect from the brill Diamond Geezer.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, March 15, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Yes I've done this

Avoiding people you know when commuting

Came across the following through Croila

"There you are, waiting at a suburban station, waiting for a train back into town. You've got, most probably, a ten minute wait for the train and then a ten minute journey into Edinburgh Waverley. It's not really a massive length of time. But that's YOUR time! You're hovering around the platform anxiously, keeping a constant watch all the other bodies that are streaming towards it, straining to pick out the one dangerous one in the madding crowds.

"Then you see him. Ex-Colleague, aka Bore of Death. Striding purposely down the steps. Your eyes flash all round the platform to see if there are any hugely fat people you can hide behind - has he seen you yet? Then with dawning horror you realise you're screwed - eye contact is made and you're doomed to desultory, banal small talk the whole way until you get into Waverley. Your hands get sweaty, your heart starts thumping, and you desperately search for an escape route."

She then continues with a bloody excellent escape route which is to pretend that your mobile phone is ringing and then to get into an animated conversation with your pretend friend. All the times I used to avoid ex-colleagues or more often than not boring "neighbours" at Kew Gardens (not my old next door neighbours, as they were cool but "neighbours" whose names you don't even know, but they happen to share the same postcode as you), I used the "head in book" escape route or the "I've suddenly forgotten how to get home/get to work and I must study the tube map as though I've never seen it before in my life" route.

Cheers Croila for reminding me of this and of the fact that, like you, I then feel like "the world's most rotten, misanthropic bitch the whole way home".

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, March 15, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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You can leave your hat on

Or take it off if it's 77 degrees

Cool - Or rather hot, just finished watching the last episode of The Tube TV series which is being repeated on Reality TV. It rocked.

This week, we met the fabulous ex-bookie, Darren Smith, whose previous occupation obviously makes him a perfect candidate for his current role as a ticket inspector. This episode was filmed in the height of summer and Darren was none too happy about wearing his full uniform:

"My kids are going to be in a paddling pool. I'm going to be sweating me balls off in Hyde Park Corner. With a hat on!"

Although, apparently when the temperature reaches 77 degrees, LU staff are allowed to take their hats off. We saw Darren in action judging whether the fare evaders were lying or not. One guy was definitely telling "a pack of lies", whereas with another guy, Darren pronounced:

"Unless he's up for a series of Academy awards, he looked genuine to me".



He then stood on the side, arms folded and assessed the guilt of a man with one of his colleagues. "Now this one's body language is all wrong. Look at him he's all defensive, suggesting he's guilty". Whereas, all Darren was guilty of, was murdering a song later on, as obviously not too camera shy, he treated us to his vocal talents.

Later on, we met another vocalist, persistent busker "Bob Marley" - this was in the days before busking got official. The station manager, who had to chase him off the premises, claimed he was nothing like his nickname:

"He's just a scruffy individual who can't sing or play his guitar. He should be taken away and shot in my opinion".



Jeesus, I'd love to see how he handled fare evaders.

Then we had a classic "chase" through the underground of the station manager speedily walking up and down escalators, as Bob Marley moved from platform to platform in a game of cat and mouse.

"I'm gonna make them work for their money today", 'Bob' said to the camera, clearly enjoying the chase.



Top series, shame it's come to an end, check out Ms Sadgrove watching the SPAD tube saftey video on last week's episode.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, March 13, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Laptops

A computer for your lap

I think it's only when you travel on trains and planes that you really see lap tops living up to their names. On Friday night going home the woman clearly heading towards Heathrow on the Piccadilly Line reminded me of one of the very few times I used a computer on my lap at Edinburgh airport.



She looked much more used to it than I was and although I felt very cosmopolitan and well travelled at the time, I was having no end of problems using the stupid little sensor instead of a mouse. I'm quite old skool and at meetings I alway plug a real mouse into my lap top.

Normally the only computers I've managed to snap on the tube are ever so slightly larger and less portable than neat lap tops - regular readers might remember the picture of the young lovers clutching their PC and the computer which may have possibly been travelling by itself.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, March 13, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Madrid Bomb Attacks

Terrorist attacks on trains

Firstly, my deepest sympathy to the families and friends of the hundreds of people who died in this attack and also to the thousands of other people injured and traumatised by this.

Travelling in today and reading Metro and staring at the front page of every body else's paper it was like that horrible car crash mentality we have of not being able to take our eyes away from something so hideous. Seeing the pictures in Metro today and even when I first heard about the crash in the small hours of Thursday morning actually, I had that internal debate whether to blog it or not. (similar internal debate on The Transport Blog) I then thought - crikey only Wednesday itself I mentioned the lack of bins on the tube as the Tube's "fight" against terrorism.

Today, I find I can't stop myself but am only reporting on how this effects me and thoughts on my journey. I'm not political enough to have major thoughts, that I want to share, about who was behind this. I just know that the attack was wrong - and that's about as political as I'm going to get.

Parts of Metro really brought home the human element and the effects on commuters, and it was all horribly similar to reports of the biggest rail disaster we had in the UK since I started goingunderground.net - the Paddington Rail Crash, which I did report on, and I'm going to end this posts with some of those.

Obviously Metro couldn't be Metro without a piece saying that "Transport in London 'is safe'", and rightly talks about our fears of similar attacks taking place in London. In fact we're just about to have a "water cooler" discussion about it at work. Commuting will go on regardless - it has to.



Anyway, no more navel gazing, I'm sure there's going to be more than enough of that in loads of other blog posts about this attack. Back to those eye witness accounts:

"There were people all over the ground like in a disaster movie. Others were crushed against the walls. After a second explosion people dropped everything, bags and shoes and ran, many trampling on others. People didn't know which way to go. Some even went into the train tunnels without thinking other trains would be coming".

And from a doctor and this is what I remember most about Paddington - "On many bodies we could hear the person's mobile phones ringing as we carted them away."

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 12, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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'Snow fun in March

Not quite as adverse as it could have been

This unseasonably cold weather and, I think, even the snow was forecast for the latter part of this week. And as Bradley mentioned, we had a bit of snow last night, which so far hasn't led to much more than a Piccadilly Line train getting stuck at Sudbury Hill. So not much in the way of the "adverse weather conditions" being the phrase of today on the "London Underground Delays" (sorry) Real Time Travel News webpage. The Metropolitan Line seems the only one really effected by snow.

I bet Bob Crow and the boys are muttering in slight frustration about suspending the strike planned for today. A Tube strike coupled with snow would have been great for their cause.

There's nothing like seeing queues and queues of fed up Londoners rubbing their hands together and huddled up at bus-stops, to make the papers report of "Travel Chaos with Tube Strike" or "Cold Commuters Cause a Commotion in Cockfosters" or if you're reading The Daily Mail - "Asylum Seekers Wreck London's Orderly Queues" and "Farringdon's Five Defraud the Memory of Diana".

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, March 12, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Just call me Mystic Meg

Tube Strike Called off

Yes as I predicted in the small hours of this morning the Underground industrial action planned for tomorrow has been called off.

And now from The Evening Standard, I finally know why the men were called the Farringdon Five:

"RMT leader Bob Crow said the strike had been "suspended" to allow the men to take their cases to employment tribunals where they will claim unfair dismissal.

The men - seven in total, although the strike ballot was based on the first five to be dismissed - were fired by employers Metronet, which is responsible for maintenance of more than two-thirds of the network. ........

Mr Crow said the decision to suspend the strike had been taken after Metronet promised that it would abide by the outcome of the employment tribunal."

And as expected there's a bit of Cavalry Ken backlash too: "there was anger among some union members at the Mayor's lastminute intervention.

One accused him of a "cheap publicity shot" by his involvement.

One member said: "He has not got involved at all with this and just wants to get in on the act for publicity purposes to make it look as though he has helped resolve it.

"It is the union's decision what to do in this dispute and not his."

Check out The Evening Standard for more info.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, March 11, 2004 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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