Rehearsal on the tube

I was either sitting opposite a mild tube nutter this morning or someone who was practising his lines from a play. It was quite funny if the latter as this guy sat opposite me, had a document on his lap and was just talking quietly to himself.

He didn't have the usual signs of a nutter - stained T shirt or dishevelled clothing, his eyes didn't seem too stary and he was talking quite quietly rather than screaming "Mind the Doors" then laughing manically like a woman on the train last week.

But you never know, he could have been one of the most scariest tube nutters yet, those ones that lull you in to a false sense of security by looking surprsingly normal and yet undernearth it all a 100% nutter keeping it all in the bounds of normality waiting to break out.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, October 13, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Tube Etiquette Sign 2

Following on from The Cartoonist locating a sign on the Tokyo subway trying to stop men from sitting with their legs apart, Peter from Sweden who signed my guestbook found the following sign from India reminding people not to grope women.



I'm pretty speechless on this one. Particularly because of the feline looking "animal" protruding from the woman's nether regions. Thanks for sharing this with us Peter. Truly bizarre.

Perhaps London Underground should get a bit more inventive with their signs and symbols too.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, October 13, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Beer Goggles again last night

This London Underground advertisement sums it up quite nicely

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, October 11, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Celebspotting

I've been doing this blog for almost ten months now and I think today is the only day this year that I've seen a celebrity on the tube. My main site has always had a section on celebrity spotting on the tube and over the years loads of people have sent me their spots, ranging from Anne Robinson and Ian Hislop to Frank Carson and Amma out of Big Brother 2.

Today I had a top tube spot and didn't notice him till I left the train at Richmond to discover he was in the same carriage as me, also getting out at Richmond. It was the actor John Hannah, he out of Four Weddings and a Funeral, who also played Scottish detective Inspector Rebus on TV, BUT most notably and relevantly starred in the top tube film Sliding Doors with Gwyneth Paltrow. To see a guy on a train who is possibly most famous for being in a film about travelling on the tube was really, really freaky.



The other thing that tends to freak me out about seeing actors in the flesh is how short a lot of them are. I got the impression that Gwyneth Paltrow was quite tall, so assumed John Hannah was too, as she didn't seem to tower over him in the film, but he's quite short for a bloke, I'm not sure if he's even six foot.

Not seen on the tube but walked past Paul McGann (who played the most recent Doctor Who and was I in the cult film Withnail and I) today in Poland Street who I had a major crush on in my youth. He was singing to himself walking down the street which I thought was quite sweet.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, October 09, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Zbornak reminded me that it's National Poetry day, so in honour here is a tube haiku from Jag

Lonely newspaper:
Grab it like hungry vulture!
I want that Metro!

For more London Underground haiku's - click here.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, October 09, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Strike ballot due to sacking of Tube Driver seen leaving gym

I must admit that I laughed when I heard this on the radio this morning, not because someone was sacked. But because of what they were sacked for. A tube driver was seen leaving a squash club when he was off sick with an ankle injury. No idea that the London Underground had so many spies around, so goodness knows who "grassed him up", although apparently he'd been told by his doctor that increasing the amount of exercise he did would actually improve his ankle.

This sacking has badly backfired on the LU as there's now going to be a ballot to go on strike in protest of his dismissal.

Bob Crow RMT leader said: "Once more London Underground is scraping the barrel in finding a pretext to sack a union activist."

For more on this check out Personnel Today.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, October 08, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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But why did you buy a child ticket, Madam?

Was what I heard two station assistants saying to a woman when I left Piccadilly Circus this morning. Well I'd have thought it was pretty obvious - she was about four feet six tall so I'm sure would have passed as a child to a sleepy station assistant who would have heard the gate beep, looked across, saw someone short and thought "Ah, child".

The woman in question was actually in her late forties though and I was going through the gates as I heard the "dispute" so couldn't be arsed to hang around to see what the outcome was.

I imagine station assistants will be super alert and "looking" out for the beeps more often as apparently the Oystercard sets off a beep when you use it. Just for the record I still haven't seen anyone using one although last night I sat opposite a woman who had one.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, October 08, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Deliriously Happy Driver speaks

Following on from Friday's entry - Richie the very funny driver from the Jubilee Line has been back in touch to say that he's happy for me to quote his email.

Richie tells the story more succintly than me, so over to him:

"I had recieved a phone call from my colleague a train operator at Wembley Park depot on the Jubilee line. He told me that he had heard my rather over the top announcements on this web site. I of course immediately went online and have to say I'm for once speechless. That could be a first for me. In case you're wondering I'm the guy you've taped and called the really really top train operator. I'm glad and I know the majority of passengers enjoy the odd banter or five and just to confirm I am sane not on drugs, generally happy and smiling and that's not wind. There is lots more to come maybe even the Friday night request ride announcing birthdays etc for those who wish. Maybe even tonight when I start at 5.00pm. Catch me if you can.

A big cheers!"

How top, so if you want to hear Richie in all his glory click here and hopefully he will team up with Nik Fox to bring us some more of his excellent announcements.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, October 07, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Threat of another tube strike

Just when we thought we'd got away with a year of no tube strikes it looks like there may be another one in the offing.

Yesterday The Evening Standard reported:

"The dispute dates back to last year when Ken Livingstone "bought off "the unions hours before strike action halted the network by promising them more money when he became mayor.

"Union leaders accepted a three per cent pay rise and returned to work. Mr Livingstone appointed a mediator - Professor Frank Burchill - who has recommended an extra .75 per cent......

"The two private consortia, Metronet and Tube Lines, which took over maintenance and improvement of the Underground earlier this year, are refusing to backdate the pay to last year........

"Both Metronet and Tube Lines say they will pay the new rates - including the extra recommended by Professor Burchill - but only from the time they took over. "

This dispute effects some 6,500 staff who are under the private consortia's employ and not London Underground.

Bob Crow leader of the main railway union the RMT, said: "London Underground has paid their staff the 16 months back pay owing on the deal. Now it is up to Metronet and Tube Lines to pay what is owed to 6,500 workers handed over to the private sector since the deal was made."

Watch this space for more news of the strike.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, October 07, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Distances between tube stations

One thing I did forget to mention in yesterday's interview was the fact that the tube map bears little relation to how far stations are from each other in reality (although this unofficial geographical tube map does).

You see loads of tourists doing a journey of one stop between Leicester Square and Piccadilly Circus when it is far, far quicker to walk. Also in relation to yesterday when we passed through Bank on the Central Line I should have referred to the oft quoted Bill Bryson quote:

"As Bill Bryson pointed out in his book Notes From a Small Island, an out-of-town visitor using Mr.Beck's map (Harry Beck designed the tube map in 1931) to get from, say, Bank Station to Mansion House would quite understandably board a Central Line train to Liverpool Street, transfer to the Circle Line and continue for another five stops to Mansion House and emerge 200 yards down the street from where he started."

Diamond Geezer has done some research and found some interesting other ones:

� Bayswater to Queensway (220 metres apart) - 14 minutes via Circle and Central lines
� Regents Park to Great Portland Street (220 metres apart) - 17 minutes via Bakerloo and Circle lines
� Euston to Euston Square (300 metres apart) - 22 minutes via Victoria and Circle lines
� St Pauls to Mansion House (400 metres apart) - 25 minutes via Bank/Monument

For more see here.

Also thanks to Diamond Geezer I've discovered a tube map which shows the walkways - it's an excellent idea and thanks to rodcorp for getting it up and running.

Anyone from London Underground reading this, why not make an official one?

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, October 07, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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German Radio Interview today

Travelled from the West to the East of the Central Line commenting on stations and life on the tube for a German Radio programme due to be broadcast on 15th November for the national German station Deutschlandfunk in their Saturday morning show - 'Gesichter Europas' - roughly translated as "Faces of Europe". This programme will be called "The Tube, die Londoner U Bahn. Geschichten aus dem Untergrund (or Stories from Underground)".

We covered a hell of a lot of ground, pigeons, etiquette, ghosts, lost stations, poetry on the underground, art, mosaics, large gaps, the Queen, cockneys, city commuters, overcrowding, air conditioning and drivers' announcements.

My section will end up being heavily edited as it's only an hour long show and the interviewer also spent an evening with a Leicester Square busker, a tube driver and will also be with a station controller.

It was all good fun and it was far less stressful than the last radio interview I did on an actual train itself (with BBC Radio London), probably cos it was a Sunday and probably because the interviewer was far less obtrusive and basically allowing me to do most of the talking.

Watch this space for a streaming of the show in November.

And before you ask.....no I can't speak German, my voice will be dubbed over, so you'll hear me in the background with a German voice over the top.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, October 06, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Oh no - Weather Pixie has her winter coat on - it's getting cold (see below text links on the right)

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, October 04, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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It's a small world on the internet

Truly bizarrely, the driver who made the mad announcements on the Jubilee Line found out about this site and sent me an email to say that he was delighted about it and wasn't mad or insane but just like to brighten up people's days. I'm hoping he'll let me get some more "deliriously happy" recordings.

Even more bizarrely, the wife of one of the drivers is saying word is spreading about the site on the whole of the Jubilee Line and all the drivers will be checking it out. See Jackie's guestbook entry on the 4th October. So welcome to all Jubilee Line drivers and keep us smiling on the tube.

Big thanks again to Nik Fox who made the original recording and sent it in.

Oyster Card - does anyone use it?

I travel into one of the busiest stations on the tube network, Piccadilly Circus - and have never seen one person swiping their Oyster Card travelcard over the little thingy on the barrier ("thingy" is a technical term for the things that have been near the tube barriers since 2002 and no one originally had a clue what they were for and still don't really know now).

Even the staff at Charing Cross station were paying lip service to the thingies by telling people to use the thingies at the next gate. As the barrier pictured below was thingyless.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, October 03, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Dogs must be carried

Saw the excellent "dogs must be carried" tube dog being carried on the escalator again today. He's the cutest thing ever and just looks like a toy dog.



I'm afraid it still gives me some amusement to see the "Dogs must be carried" sign at the bottom of escalators as I do think that there will be a number of confused tourists wondering where they're going to get a dog so that they can travel up the escalator.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, October 03, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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24 hour London Underground service.....getting nearer?

Mmmm we may be nearer to getting a 24 hour tube service but only cos of London's bid to host the Olympics in 2012. Today's Evening Standard said:

"Bid promoters say they desperately need a 24-hour service to carry an estimated 200,000 extra public transport users across the capital during the games.

"But the Mayor - who has long wanted trains to run all night, at least at weekends - faces obstacles to London Underground running a full 24-hour service........

"Cynthia Hay, of passenger pressure group Capital Transport, said: "If 24-hour operation can be used to entice the Olympics, why can't it be done before that?" "

Very true.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, October 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Read this Blog translated by Snoop Doggy Dogg

If you want to get a bit jiggy wi it an ting. Get you mutha over to dis link and get wi da London Underground blog as written by my homey Snoop.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, October 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Losing My Religion Tube Busker - captured for posterity

Today I happened to be sitting in a good position to get a picture of my "favourite" busker and to be able to record the closing ear splitting bars of his tune. I still cannot believe how much money this man gets. He had loads of people making donations this evening and even if they only put in about ten or twenty pence each he would have made at least a couple of quid in two minutes.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, September 30, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Conspiracy theory blown (quite literally)

D'OH - just when we thought the London blackout and attendant chaos on the tube a couple of weeks ago was all a government plot to steer media attention away from the Hutton inquiry I just learnt through Simon Waldman's blog that it was mostly to do with the wrong fuse being fitted, something that even a big girl like me would have problems doing.

Britain's biggest blackout for 25 years, which plunged large parts of London into darkness, was the result of a one amp fuse being fitted in place of a 5,000 amp fuse at a substation. said The Guardian.

D'OH, D'OH, D'OH

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, September 30, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Tube buskers on TV

Watched the TV programme Busking Underground at the weekend on video. (Originally broadcast last Thursday on ITV) Must say I wasn't overly impressed with it and thought it was quite dull really. It was about the trial of the official London Underground buskers and how they were initially chosen. Very quietly spoken voiceover and most of the buskers being interviewed were very compliant and ..... dull.

Did recognise a girl playing a recorder who turns out to be called Netty. Also a punk looking violinist who's called Dimitri.



I was amazed that even the ones at busy stations like Piccadilly Circus only earned about �10 an hour. I'm not really sure how much I thought they'd earn, but I thought it would be more than that.

The guy that did really well was playing a didgeridoo and he got about �50 in a two hour session and had "crowds" of people round him.

As I walked past the spot at Piccadilly Circus this morning (as I do everyday) I was struggling to remember when I had seen more that two or three people actually standing still and watching the buskers themselves.

Most interested to learn that the company that organises the auditions Automatic is owned by comedian, writer and wife of Billy Connolly, Pamela Stephenson. So that's what she gets up to in her spare time.

I actually felt sorry for poor old Carling too. They sponsor the whole busking thing and even though the programme was on ITV they were referred to as a "drinks company" and any shot with their name on it had the logo blurred out.

For more on buskers check out goingunderground.net's busking page.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 29, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Another top poster

Having a good run of seeing tube related posters this week. The following had me and loads of people reading it on the platform of Piccadilly Circus on the Bakerloo Line heading north. It's from Sue Townsend's Number Ten and describes a fictional incident of the Prime Minister being on the tube.

Sorry about the quality of the picture but the most relevant bits are the opening and closing lines:

"Jack and the Prime Minister were in darkness standing on a stationary Northern Line train. The Prime Minister hated the dark.......

"Now he was hanging on a handle that was suspended from the ceiling of the train, sweat running between the push me up and squeeze me together cups of his wife's brassiere. A madman began to shout about Sir Cliff Richard - accusing him of forcing Hank Marvin to become a Jehovah's Witness"



As the poster implored us to "read more" I'm certainly tempted to.

For more of the real PM on the tube see goingunderground.net's report.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, September 26, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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It's my birthday, my b-b-b-birthday

Well it was yesterday. So it was the beer goggles on last night as I came home from a night out in Soho (that'll give Google searchers something to think about) with workmates.

Fortunately I managed to get home with my keys and without having had lots of shots which is usually what happens with work nights out. All was smooth on the way home except the tube gods weren't with me at Turnham Green and I had to wait ten minutes in the cold for a train to Richmond.

I have lost count of the amount of times I have sat or stood at Turnham Green station which should be re-named Turnham Blue as that is the colour your extremities go in the winter there. The only waiting room at Turnham Green is a tiny little hut of room which usually smells of urine and most of the time is locked. However sometimes I have been so desparately cold I have waited in there and even worse fallen asleep in there. Not pleasant.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, September 25, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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The Career Line

Another top ad viewed coming home this evening for Energizer batteries:



Love the tube imagery.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, September 24, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Losing my Religion - Tube Busker (part three)

Crikey, had the "delights" of the busker that "sings" and "plays" REM's Losing My Religion for the umpteenth time on going home tonight (last outings in this blog - June 3rd and August 14th). I noticed that he seemed to have lost a few teeth since the last time I saw him and the mind boggles as to how he lost them. I'm amazed the guy still gets money and with that amazing co-incidence that you can only get when commuting, the people who gave him money on the 14th August gave him more money today! He really shouldn't be encouraged as the last final chords he plays on that song really set my teeth on edge.

Actually I've had a bit of a busking couple of days myself having discovered the excellent Eurobuskers website at the weekend and finding out that on the 25th September there's going to be programme on ITV1 imaginatively called Busking Undergroundwhich follows Carling's and the London Underground's "pilot" scheme to legalise buskers at certain tube stations. It's produced by Mosaic Films who made a good TV series on the London Underground earlier in the year. For more on all of this check out my page on tube music.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 22, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Text your Customer Charter Delays - Tube Refunds

What a fantastic new idea. After the debacle over the Central Line closure and the many claims for compensation, Tube Refund have come up with a great way of making your claims to the London Underground under the Customer Charter easy. The Customer Charter seems to be little known on the tube.

"The London Underground Customer Charter offers a very straightforward refund system for an individual journey delayed more than 15 minutes (except in circumstances outside LU control such as freak weather or security alerts). Claim forms are available at any London Underground station. The refund amount is the standard single fare for the Underground journey you were undertaking."

The problem is that it's quite a hassle to remember to pick up a form, fill it in, post it back, so now, thanks to Tube Refund with a simple text or email, you get a form created and completed in minutes and you send it off the to London Underground by freepost. Up until the 1st November 2003 the service is free, so make the most of it. After that point it's a fiver for 25 forms and considering you could get from �25 to �92.50 for those claims it's still a bargain.

According to The Times the London Underground only receives 1 refund claim for every 1,600 passengers, so hopefully this service will redress the balance.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Sunday, September 21, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Now today I did see a real old lady on the tube and I was just about too late to take a picture of loads of people still sitting down while she stood holding onto a pole looking round for a seat. Needless to say I was standing myself and doing my best Paddington hard stares to try to get people to look in her direction and give her a seat....but to no avail. By the time I got my camera out of my bag to try to get some documentary evidence of this we got to the next stop and several of the lazy bastards near her got off so she was able to have a seat.

I'm sorry but it's one of my major pet hates when people just get tunnel vision on the tube and pretend not to see people who quite clearly need a seat.

For more on when you should or shouldn't give a seat check out this section of www.goingunderground.net.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, September 17, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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I am an older woman

Coming home tonight on a pretty crowded tube for the District Line I was standing in front of two teenage girls - one of whom was talking for the entire population of London whilst snacking into a bag of Wheat Crunchies. Fortunately for me they jumped off at Stamford Brook saying "shit" as Turnham Green station was closed and they'd been talking too much to hear the previous announcement.

I sat down and the man in his late fifties/early sixties, next to me said "Their mothers should be given a good talking to" I looked a bit puzzled and he explained, "I can't believe they didn't get up to let an older woman sit down". I actually looked around thinking I hadn't seen any old ladies get onto the tube, and then, with a horrible realisation, gathered that he was referring to me!

Jeesus, I will soon be celebrating the last year of my thirties but didn't think that made me old enough to be seen as someone that teenage girls should get up for. Teenage boys yes, men of any age, yes - I know very sexist, but hey. To set the record straight I really don't expect anyone to stand up for me, apart from when I had my broken leg, and then I would give people such dirty looks if they didn't stand up, I got the feeling they thought I might hit them with my crutches.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 15, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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What's something that 24% of women admit to doing on the tube?

They will have problems doing it standing up.

They normally need to sit down to do it.

It helps to have a mirror on hand.

It's something I do every morning.

I don't do on the way home that often.

It sometimes attracts a lot of stares from fellow passengers.

I think most women do it in the bedroom or bathroom.

You really, really shouldn't do whilst driving.

It's nothing exciting really..... just putting on make-up.

So almost a quarter of female commuters do this. It's no surprise and it's not like picking your nose or something, but I get amazed at the dirty looks you get from some people whilst doing this. I bet men would shave on the tube if they could be bothered to buy electric razors and weren't being sold the advantages of wet shaving all of the time by Gillette.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, September 11, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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(Tuesday September 9th - really)

The tube fairies were with me

Went out for a meeting in the City and didn't leave until quite late and there were massive delays on the Central Line having a knock on effect to the District. So taking the advice of the announcer I jumped on the first available train which was heading to Wimbledon thinking I'll change at Hurl's Court or Ell's Court or Earl's Court depending on which part of London you're from. After a few stops down the tube fairies who are not on my side very often decided to pay a visit.

The driver announced: "I'm sorry to say ladies and gentlemen that this train is not heading to Wimbledon but to Richmond" I have never in my life been so glad to hear the words "I'm sorry to say", as this meant that I was now as if by magic on the train going to my stop at Kew Gardens (the penultimate stop to Richmond).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, September 10, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/09/tuesday-september-9th-really-tube.html

A little knowledge is not a dangerous thing.....

Coming home tonight I got to Glamoursmith (aka Hammersmith) to change onto the beloved District Line. It was about 7.10 and there were an unusally large amount of people there for that time of night. Nothing showing on the indicator and no announcements from the station assistants. So I thought "Right" and stormed over to the help point machine, pressed the blue button for information and waited. After about 30 seconds a guy came on asking if he could help me. I explained there were a lot of people on the platform, no signs of trains and could he let us know when the next one was. After explaining that I was going to Richmond, the line appeared to go dead for a minute, but the guy came back and said it will be about 8-10 minutes.

Great, why not tell us then?

So I politely asked him to make an announcement across the platform as no one knew what was going on and could he also let the people waiting for an Ealing Broadway train know what was going on.

The line went dead and I scowled and some women sitting nearby were giving me encouraging looks and quietly saying "You Go Girl" to themselves.



30 seconds later and there were two announcements over the platform telling every one that the trains were leaving Earls Court or South Ken or somewhere further up the line.

Victory. Then every few minutes there were more announcements telling people about the progress. That was my good deed for the day, but you know tube guys a little knowledge isn't a dangerous thing, it might mean you get a bus instead, or it might mean you go off to get some chocolate, but it simply lets you know what the hell is going on.


Cooling Down the Tube - Official Rules at last

I'd always thought it was a bit suspicious that there was nothing about Mayor Ken Livingstone's offer of a reward of �100,000 to find an air conditioning system for the tube, on the official London Underground website. I'd reported on this when I first heard about this in July! And now in September in usual timely fashion, the tube have decided to resurrect interest in the idea by splashing it across the front page of their site (and it's loads less topical as the heatwave's over - good timing Tube PR guys).

So if you fancy your chances of getting your hands on 100 grand from Sheriff Ken - get your thinking caps on quickly as you only have until the 12th September to apply. For the official rules (strangely under "promotions & offers") see here.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 08, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Welcome to WebUser Readers!

Hi to you if you've found this blog from this fortnight's WebUser magazine where it's featured in BlogOn! pg 14. Massive thanks to Toby Earle for giving the blog and GoingUnderground.net such a top write up: "Annie's transformed the Tube into the commuters' version of Alice in Wonderland....everyone should stop at Going Underground".

Enough, praise and bragging...... if you're looking for specific stuff there's a little search of this blog powered by Google in the right hand links and also on the right you'll be able to navigate the vastness that is Going Underground. You'll soon gather that I'm not a website designer but believe in telling a good story. So if you're looking for probably the biggest collection of funny train - tube driver's announcements you've come to the right place. If you just want to see how I get on with my daily commute (not as boring as it might sound) read on......



Diamond Geezer's Tube Quiz

Damn you, diamond geezer, I thought I had created the most fiendishly difficult london underground quiz but your one on "guess the Central Line tube station name from the picture" has got me stumped.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, September 04, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/09/welcome-to-webuser-readers-hi-to-you.html

Drunk Alert

Went straight to a meeting from home this morning so left a little later than normal and took the Circle Line - it was about 10.30am when I spotted a rather inebriated gentleman clutching a can of Diamond White and with a seat suspciously empty next to him. Well it wasn't suspciously empty when you think about it. If you get on a pretty crowded train and there's an empty seat, there's likely to be a good reason for it, and the best reason is that you'll be sitting next to some undesireable.



Check out www.goingunderground.net for more on this seat "rule".

BBC6 discover Goingunderground.net

Nice little mention on BBC Radio 6 today check out their Website Wasteland section - thanks to DJ Gideon Coe.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, September 03, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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London News Review - launch and PAAARTY

Today looks like one of your last chances to become a founder member what looks like it's going to be one of the best print mags that London has ever seen. The London News Review will be launched sometime this month and has some cracking contributors.

Of particular interest to this blog is Richard Herring (part of the comedy double act Herring & Lee) - he's going to be doing his own tube diary which I'll be shadowing with interest - looks like I'll have strong competition.

Also it's from the stable of some of the UK's most successful email magazines including The Friday Thing, which was apparently the first general interest email magazine in Europe to become profitable through paid subscriptions; and, what got me interested in them, the great London city guide London By London - has me in fits every Monday morning.

So if you want to subscribe to the mag and get an invite to the star studded party you know where to go!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, September 02, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/09/london-news-review-launch-and-paaarty.html

Alroight guv Walford East gets a boat race lift

To lighten the mood from the power cuts, London's most popular tube station - the fictional Walford East in the BBC soap EastEnders is going to undergo a face lift to make it seem as authentic as possible. This means adding a stack of Metro newspapers to the outside!

According to Metro itself, London Underground's Natalie Sutton, who visited the set, said: 'Their copies are looking a bit dog-eared now - but Metro is so much part of London's life, they want it in shot.'



Too right Natalie - EastEnders has certainly got it right though with the amount of drunks and undesireables found loitering around the tube. If they could have a few of the actors coming out and moaning about delays or being stuck in tunnels they'd be spot on.

For more on this famous station check out tube celebs on goingunderground.net.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/09/alroight-guv-walford-east-gets-boat.html

London's Power cut - blackout - continued

Conspiracy theories abound on last week's power failure in London. Was it all a cunning plot by the government to take the heat off and divert attention from Tony Blair who was having to answer to the government's position in the Hutton enquiry as a response to David Kelly's suicide. Lots of letters in Metro today on this theory.

Also the National Grid have apologised for the power failure - although I heard on the radio that they had warned there was a 20% chance of something like this happening if there was not more investment into the system.

For once though the tube drivers deserve to be called "heroes" the fact that more people did not panic when they were stuck in tunnels was down to the drivers keeping people calm and telling them what was going on. The tube staff appeared to be exemplary when leading people out of stuck tubes and down darkened tunnels. People are talking about the spirit of the blitz and London stocism which actually in this case seems to be true.

The Evening Standard headline screamed that "250,000 commuters were stuck on the London Underground" - meaning 250,000 commuters (inlcuding me) were inconvenienced by it. We weren't all stuck on the tube - Thank God. "Terror as evacuation order given" - no one appeared to be terrified, but people calmly got on with trying to get home, or spent hours in a pub to while away the time.

Again was this all a "spin" to divert attention away from our Prime Minister?

I also wonder if the "mock evacution" will take place on the 7th September, now that we've had a real one?

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, September 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/09/londons-power-cut-blackout-continued.html

As predicted there were many tales in the office today about how long it had taken to get home. One of our techies thought they had won, by taking four hours, but it transpired he sat in the pub for 3 hours waiting for the tubes to get back to normal - so obviously that didn't count. I think my friend who I left work with yesterday was proably the winner as although we left together she's from the north and has no idea about London buses, so came back to the office after seeing there was nothing doing on the tube and then stayed in the office till 10.30pm - 10.45pm and left when something on the net said power was back on. That was a bit extreme and slightly "mad as ham" in my opinion and the worrying thing is that she looks after our pay and finances.

Today, there was a knock on effect and I had to wait twenty minutes for my tube this morning and then coming home late, there were no bloody District Line trains to Richmond, so got off at Turnham Green, got some chips and caught the bus. I'm beginning to catch a lot of buses these day - perhaps I should change the focus of my blog.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, August 30, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/as-predicted-there-were-many-tales-in.html

London's power cut

Do not (I repeat) do not, ask any Londoner about their journey home this evening.

I was one of the lucky ones and actually got home in about an hour and forty minutes which was only fifty minutes longer than normal and that's because I'd heard about the power cut before I left work, so left work at about 7.40pm and got home at about 9pm. The tubes were a complete non starter for me, so I threw myself on a bus before I had any idea of the real extent of the power cut, then got off somewhere in South East London and walked three quarters of a mile to Waterloo station where luckily I got a train and more importantly a seat and after sitting for twenty minutes the train slowly left and I got to Kew Bridge, started to walk home. Then thought f**k this for a game of soldiers and hailed a cab to do the last part home.

For the full story check out SKY news, at the time of writing this blog very few of the UK news websites seemed to have anything to report:

"Thousands were trapped in underground trains and tunnels for up to an hour when power failed at around 6.30pm.

"Hundreds of traffic lights and street lights failed and by the time the National Grid fault was corrected at 7pm, many had given up hope and were spending the evening in pubs and bars."

Masochists can check out SKY's picuture gallery.



The BBC also reported that:

"South London was hardest hit and Transport for London said 60% of the Tube network was affected.

"Stations and trains were evacuated as commuters using the Tube were plunged into darkness and some were stuck underground as the power went off at about 1820 BST. .......

"Mayor of London Ken Livingstone said at least 250,000 people were affected and said the situation showed the need for a serious look at the National Grid and why power went down for so long."

Obviously everyone's talking about the similarities between this and the power cut in New York which only happened a couple of weeks ago. Typically as well after the heatwave we had in London, guess which night it chose to rain for the first time in ages!!!

No doubt we will hear the full extent tomorrow along with stories of woe about how long it took people to get home.

Only a few London bloggers have had the strength to report it so for, but check out the ever trusty Meg at meish.org, and Aderemi perhaps everyone else is still getting home!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, August 29, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/londons-power-cut-do-not-i-repeat-do.html

Tube poet

Forget to say that last Friday 22nd August on the Northern Line at about 6ish (not my normal line thank God) I saw this tube poet/busker reciting a poem about commuting. He was white, quite skinny, skinhead with a strange long strand of blue hair protruding from the front.

He got on the train and said something like "Ladies and Gentleman can I have a moment of your time?" (which is tantamount to saying - "I am a tramp or a nutter and about to embarrass you") He then recited a "poem" about tube commuting which I wish to the life of me I could have remembered, but it's something like:

A is for the arseholes that we travel with everyday
B is for Bureaucracy that always makes you pay etc etc

I made the above two up, but some actual ones were:

J is for the jealousy for those that have a seat

M is for the announcer saying Mind the Gap
N is for the newspapers that are always full of crap

P is for the pervert who is staring at your crutch

He went through the whole alphabet, during which there a few smiles and then lots of shuffling as it was going on a bit too long and we wondered what he'd do at the end. When it did actually end, there was a silence, and he said "Ah come on folks - you can do better than that" - still nothing. Then he looked all hurt and stood in the corner swigging from a bottle of mineral water and got off at the next stop.

Does the poor man do this every day?

Does anyone else know the whole poem or can you fill in some of the lines?

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, August 27, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/tube-poet-forget-to-say-that-last.html

Bloggers on the tube

Yes there are other fellow bloggers on the tube. I was coming down the escalator at Piccadilly Circus this evening and spotted a man with a blogger - blogspot logo on his record bag. I almost ran after him to shake him warmly by the hand and say "welcome fellow blogger" but then Londoner and commuter's sense took over so I just struggled to get onto the crowded tube at Piccadilly Circus, travelled one stop, got turfed out with the whole train at Green Park and then made my way home by British Rail. D'OH.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, August 27, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Sleeping on the tube - Round 789

Very nearly missed my stop coming home tonight. Only had a few drinks with people after work - honest guv it was only three, but must have been knackered so fell asleep. Woke up to find the station looking familiar. The ten seconds to connect from my fuzzy head to my legs was just about enough to leap through the sliding doors. Perhaps I should do the trick that someone told me about which is putting your mobile phone alarm on in about the length of time you think it will take you to get home. Trouble is when you're tired/and or drunk the chances of you programming your phone alarm with the right time are very slim.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, August 22, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/sleeping-on-tube-round-789-very-nearly.html

Dante's Inferno

OH MY GOD - was on the tube this morning with a huge party of Italians (there were ten of them). I have nothing against Italians I just have a problem with large loud gesticulating people talking at the tops of their voices and shouting "Maria", "Eh Giovanni", "Lucia" down the carriage at about 9.30 in the morning when you're just trying to come to terms with the day. Horrible thoughts came through my mind about what would happen if I got stuck in the tunnel with these people. How would I survive without killing them?

Amazingly, the person in the party who was most irritating/fascinating (apart from the one sitting next to me shouting "Eh Giovanni" down the carriage) was the woman diagonally opposite me. She was wearing an enormous pair of really black sunglasses (sunglasses worn in the tunnels of tubes is always the sign of a dubious character or someone with something to hide) and constantly fanning herself with a decorative lacy looking fan. We could have been in Venice sailing gently down canals on a gondola as she looked totally distracted and unaware of her noisy friends.

I wish I could have swapped places with her.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, August 21, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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It' Snow joke on the tube

Regular readers of this blog will know Mayor Ken Livingstone issued a �100,000 reward for anyone who could invent a workable solution for air conditioning on the London Underground. The tube's always has a problem of how to cool narrow tunnels - some built well over a hundred years ago and many 60 metres under London's streets. Apparently over 3,000 people from around the world sent in ideas on cooling down the tube in the recent heatwave we had. An idea from Israel which is currently getting a lot of publicity involves giant snow machines above ground. A similar idea was used to cool down gold mines in South Africa:

"The snow made at street-level would be pumped through pipes into containers placed in train tunnels or at platform entrances.

Then as trains pass through it would create air currents causing cold air from the containers to circulate and cool passengers in stations. " said the BBC

Sounds a bit barking mad to me, and I'd quite like to know "the science bit" behind it.

A spokesman for London Underground said: "We cannot comment on specific ideas as this would prejudice them and subsequent entries."

But keep those mad ideas coming in as there's no deadline yet for submitting "cool" ideas.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, August 19, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/it-snow-joke-on-tube-regular-readers.html

Kiwis discover Going Underground

Since Sunday I noticed lots of people from New Zealand visiting the main site www.goingunderground.net, just by typing it into their browser which makes me think it may have been in a Kiwi Sunday paper this weekend. Now thanks to Leonie I discovered that the site was featured in a weekly email newsletter to all subscribers of Xtra webased email accounts. A sort of Hotmail account for Kiwis. Here's what they said:

"Going underground
You've probably heard that rainy old England just had its hottest day since records began. All very well you might think, but no fun at all if you're stuck in a sweltering tube tunnel. Just the same, many Kiwis have fond memories of the Underground and this is an excellent place to relive them. more>>"

Thanks mates and a special thanks to Leonie for forwarding the newsletter.

Wet, wet, wet

As you'll see from the weather pixie in the right hand panel underneath the links - it actually rained in London today for the first time in ages. So finally we can get back to normal blogging and not go on about how hot it is.

This morning, however, it was bright, sunny and hot and people were sitting on the big planters that have suddenly sprouted at Kew Gardens station. Most people are using them as bins too. I wonder when something will actually be planted in them as they're a bit of a security risk left empty like that and the tube went to so much trouble to introduce clear plastic rubbish bins, it seems mad to have ruddy great empty black planters around.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, August 18, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/kiwis-discover-going-underground-since.html

Busking re-visited

The poor old pale busker who drones out REM's Losing My Religion was on the tube yet again tonight. You may have first met him in my blog a few weeks back. Amazingly he resulted in more spontaneous tube chat. The woman next to me to no-one in particular said:

"Oh no, not him again"

The woman next to her actually replied, "Yes I wish he's pick a different song"

The woman opposite said, "I think he does it quite well though"

I almost fainted. Not because someone thought he was good, but because a conversation of sorts had started between three complete strangers and this simply isn't done on the tube. Particularly as they all looked completely normal and also because they were all women, but I spose that's why it happened. Sisterly comradeship on the qualities or not of our busking friend.

I still think he's pretty rubbish, despite the fact a guy a couple of seats down gave him a round of applause and some money, but then him and his girlfriend had just got back from holiday (lots of luggage, bikini tan) and then holiday man started singing the song to himself even when the busker had finished.

So if you're on the District Line, look out for this really unhealthy pasty looking, slightly flabby man with his guitar who brings the gift of conversation. For more reactions to him see my June 3rd entry.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, August 14, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/busking-re-visited-poor-old-pale.html

Lovely lady tube driver yesterday

Didn't have time to report back yesterday but there was a really well spoken, polite, friendly and cheerful sounding woman driver on the tube home last night. She even managed to thow in a little joke about "having a cold shower when you leave the train". She politely broke the bad news that the Piccadilly Line train was going to be diverted to Rayners Lane rather than Heathrow where it was supposed to be going. Although, this resulted in a loud "Oh for f**k's sake" from a guy standing near me.

She should take over from Sonia as she was top. Or perhaps she was a trainee Sonia in disguise.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, August 13, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/lovely-lady-tube-driver-yesterday.html

Why does a train behind us cause delays?

Coming home this evening I was stuck at Green Park for what seemed like half an hour. OK, OK it was probably only six to eight minutes but when you are standing in a crowded carriage with hundreds of other people, when it's boiling hot, when everyone is using every single large piece of paper from handbags or spare newspapers as fans and when the driver tells you the delay is due to a train behind you..... it feels like half an hour.

The poor driver was doing his best to keep us informed with announcements every two minutes, but his was as puzzled as the rest of us as to why a train being delayed at King's Cross - several stations behind, should cause the delay at Green Park. If any engineers or Tube powers that be are reading this, can they let me and the other sweltering passengers on the Westbound Piccadilly Line train at about 5.45- 6pm know.

The driver had started out with a favourite driver's announcement "you might find it easier to let the passengers off the train first before getting on" when I got on a Piccadilly Circus. But one stop later, with the delay at Green Park he joined commuters with the sound of frustration and "only on the tube" tone of dismay in his voice.

Hot hot hot - round 85

It's official - The Guardian tell us that it is hot enough to fry an egg on a pavement!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, August 11, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/why-does-train-behind-us-cause-delays.html

London Underground Security Testing - Round Two

Well, we were supposed to have had one in March at Bank station, but now, possibly in an effort to re-spin Tony Blair's statment that there will be an al Qaeda backlash in response to the UK's involvement with the war, another mock terrorist attack - biological, chemical - on the tube has been announced. It's supposed to be on Sunday 7th September and strikes me as a very good day to avoid Bank Station.

I just find it a bit suspicious that shortly after Tony Blair announces that there is a threat of terrorism from al Qaeda we get this announcement. Is it just going to make everyone think there is a very real threat of terrorism? Is it like the very public coverage of troops patrolling and protecting Heathrow airport as war was announced? (Oh yeah - where were all those weopans of mass destruction again?) As the BBC reported - exactly how real is this threat?

As a long time tube traveller, the London Underground has always been under threat of a terrorist target from a wide variety of groups. Over time there have been loads of bomb scares, evacuations, removal of suspect packages and more. Living in London you can be under threat of "terrorism" all the time. Two pubs both within 10 minutes of where I work have been bombed in the last ten years.

Most Londoners I know are extremely vigilant and the tube also do a pretty good job of responding to unattended packages. Would be interesting to know what others think?


Oh by the way - it is BLOODY HOT on the tube right now - just in case no one had realised.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, August 11, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/london-underground-security-testing.html

FRIDAY AUGUST 8th (ignore the blog date above)

Hot, hot, hot (re-visited)

Yes it's hot in London, it's hotter on the tube. More sweat, high quota of Birkenstock sandals spotted. A bit more taste in the "I'm so hot I must wear as few clothes as possible" fashionista also spotted. Large number of nice strappy tops on women. Men you're lagging behind.

Yesterday due to various heat related delays I was expected to wait twenty minutes for a Central Line train. I thought the dox matrix indicator below was a joke and waited a minute to see if the flashing lights CORRECTION would come up and waited to be re-assured with the normal five or six minute wait. Sadly there were no CORRECTIONS and no reassurance. Luckily camera was in hand to record one of the longest breaks between trains in central London I have seen.



I got a bus instead.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Saturday, August 09, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/friday-august-8th-ignore-blog-date.html

Stop saying your site's so Gay

I'm really loving this latest Goingunderground namecheck. After the honour of being one of FHM's top 100 websites, today I found out that the gay community had discovered the site.

Boyz magazine (London's most widely read weekly publication for gay men) report:

"The Tube is an everyday part of many a Londoner's existence, and that's why the brilliant website at www.goingunderground.net is so fascinating. The resource is huge, and tells you everything you ever wanted to know about our subterranean transport system, and a few things you wish you didn't. For example, the peak time for Tube suicides is at 11am at King's Cross...............Okay, so some of it may be bullshit, but we love the urban myth about man-eating troglodytes living in closed Tube stations, and that one of the female automated voice announcers is called Sonia - because her voice �gets on yer nerves.� "



Thanks boyz!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, August 08, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/stop-saying-your-sites-so-gay-im.html

Kids say the funniest things

Had the pleasure of sitting next the three little boys (aged about four or five) and their au pair while waiting for the tube at Kew Gardens today and overheard the following:

Boy 1: Look at that poster for Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Several rousing choruses of the song Chitty Chitty Bang Bang later

Boy 2: But that man, he's not the same as the other man.

The poster was of the black performer Gary Wilmot, who's replaced the usual white performer Michael Ball. I waited with baited breath.

Boy 3: Why's he different?

Boy 1: Perhaps he's not the real man, but he's just showing the picture off.

Pause

Boy 2: Look the lights, a train is coming.

Boy 1: That light is amber.

Boy 3: Amber is green

Boy 1: No green is green

We board the train and speed off.

Boy 2: Look there's the train going by that Daddy gets to work

Boy 1: Do you know what my Daddy calls trains?

Boy 3: What?

Boy 1: Tubes. He calls them tubes.

Boys 2 and 3: Why?

Long pause as they all think about it and we approach the next station.

Boy 3: What's this station?

Boy 2: Gunnersbee

Boy 1: What?

Boy 2: That sign says "this station is called Gunnersbree".

Pause

Boy 3: You know what?

Boy 2: What?

Boy 3: You and your Daddy and Mummy are so rich. While we are so poor

Much snorting from the au pair and the rest of the carriage who can't hold in the laughter much longer. Little treasures.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, August 07, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/kids-say-funniest-things-had-pleasure.html

How u feelin?....Hot, Hot, Hot!


Top cross track tube advert spotted to day for Abbey National about the summer specials they would love to provide us if they could.

Instead all we get on the underground are the delays of 12 minutes or more. Overground lines buckling in the heat having a knock on effect on the lines underground. I was almost late for an afternoon meeting in King's Cross, and it was in an air conditioned office which was wonderful. When I stepped outside it was seriously like walking into an oven, so I bought an ice- cream, (actually Abbey National have a point why don't we get free ice cream instead of Mayor Ken's promise of �100,000 for an air conditioning solution?), got on the tube home and was feeling remarkably smug and cool until I got about six stops down the line and was dripping with sweat again.



Just noticed however that according to the Evening Standard the tube have ordered loads of bottles of water - 15,000 half litres in fact: "in case commuter trains break down and become stranded. An LU spokeswoman said: 'The forecast is for very high temperatures today and we want to be ready. A stranded train could have 1,000 people on board.' The spokeswoman emphasised the water would only be handed out in an emergency."

That's nice then, so it looks like free ice creams are definitely out of the question.

The article in the Standard continues saying that "The worst conditions yesterday (5th August 2003) were in a waiting room on the platform at Hammersmith station, with temperatures up to 38.4C (101F). With a relative humidity of 55 per cent the apparent temperature was 52C (126F). The legal maximum for transporting animals is 35C (95F).

"On one crowded Circle line train at 5pm yesterday the temperature was 33.9C with a relative humidity of 65 per cent, creating an apparent temperature of 48C (119F). "

It's a heatwave.... wave goodbye to fashion

Lots of women appeared to be wearing underwear today (and nothing else), several more Birkenstock sandals spotted and loose breasted women without underwear who clearly should have been wearing some under their skimpy T shirts. More heat tomorrow forecast, and more waving goodbye to fashion sense.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, August 06, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/how-u-feelin.html

Hot hot hot

Although not as hot and stuffy on the tube as my journey home yesterday where I was unpleasantly glowing - ie dripping in sweat. The rails on British Rail trains are buckling in the heat, but fortunately not too many horrors on the Underground. Although I read in Metro yesterday that a train was stuck in a tunnel for about 40 minutes yesterday, luckily no one needed medical attention or suffered unduly from it. Perhaps people are taking note of the tube's "In this hot weather....." posters and are carrying water on the tube.

Birkenstock Sandals

I'm sorry, but every other person I see in London is wearing a pair. Even their website says they can't keep up with demand.



I got a pair last week on recommendation from a friend at work as they are supposed to be the most comfortable sandals ever and you won't ever wear anything else once you've put them on your feet. We both bought a white pair of the version above. My friend's badly cut her feet and mine are far from comfortable, but I'm persevering with them. Every other commuter in London can't be wrong and I want to get those dirty toe marks on the base of the sole, like everyone else, so that I know I've worn them in. Even if I end up walking around like a geisha girl I will live to tell the tale that they are the most comfortable sandals ever.

Birkenstock wearer
You are not alone right now
Don't step on my toes

Another tube haiku moment!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, August 05, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/hot-hot-hot-although-not-as-hot-and.html

London Underground about turn, volte face, whatever

To be perfectly honest I've really not been closely following all the PPP wranglings on the tube. Like most commuters I want a service that works, that is safe, that doesn't break down and doesn't cost a small fortune to get me from A- B or Angel to Barking, but being me I do keep an eye out for little inconsistencies in the running of the Underground. Looks like the first one concerning PPP has happened today.

One of the policies which won Metronet and Tubelines (the private companies partially responsible for running the tube) their bid was a promise that if ever major engineering was required and the tube would be closed down in places this would only happen at weekends or for the four hours when the tube was not running at night. Now, they have changed their tune, just a tad (note the irony).

Terry Morgan, chief executive of Tubelines, said: "There is a question over how we manage our programme on engineering. It may be a good idea to revisit the approach over blockades, and whether that would be a better solution for all parties involved." For the uniniated "blockades" mean closing down parts of the tube for weeks at a time - like the months it was closed down for the Central Line repairs.

Check out The Evening Standard for the latest on this.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, August 04, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
Tweet http://london-underground.blogspot.com/2003/08/london-underground-about-turn-volte.html

Baby Born on the Subway

OK it was in America, but on the 30th of July, Joyce Judge gave birth in the carriage of a subway train in Boston in the rush hour and then calmly wrapped the baby in the scarf and got of the tube. People did actually let her sit down and it all seemed to go very smoothly.

Could you imagine that happpening on the tube in London? It's unlikely she'd get a seat. People would be telling her to stop screaming as they were trying to solve 12 down on their crossword. Tramps and beggers would be asking her to give them a quid for a room for the night. And the rest of the carriage would be staring at the ads pretending that nothing out of the ordinary was going on.

As far as I know only one person was ever born in a tube carriage in London and that was in 1924. She was christened Thelma Ursula Beatrice Eleanor. Source - GoingUnderground's little known tube facts

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, August 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Lost Property

Anyone who knows me personally, knows that I have a huge amount on my mind right now and am getting a bit distracted. So much so that this week I have left two (count them, two) umbrellas on the tube and trains (and it's only Thursday). This led me to think about the lost property office and some of the weird things that have been left on the tube. WARNING - Sad trainspotter fact alert - every year over 130,000 items are left on tubes, buses, trains and taxis in London and each year 60,000 people actually get their stuff back. It's nice to know that umbrellas are most often left behind.

Some of the weirder unclaimed items that haven't made it back to their owners are: a wedding dress, a lawyer�s gown, a 40-pound, four-foot exercise machine, a kitchen sink, and two urns. This is almost so sad it has to be true. Would the Reader's Digest, from where this info was sourced, lie?


TUBE HAIKU's - The Next Generation

The marvellous Meg from notsosoft.com (inspired me to start blogging and that blog was so brilliantly written and diverting it's not true) has a new blog - meish.org and noticed my tube haiku campaign and pointed out that her and some other friends had already started writing Tube Haikus in July 2000 (almost ancient history in blog terms). There's some crackers amongst them and I've reproduced a few seasonal ones for your enjoyment.

Inconsiderate
bastards wearing sandals. Smell
of foot sweat. I faint.

Armpit in my face
Please take your hand off my arse:
Tube space invaders

Too many people
And all are sweaty morons -
Tomorrow, the bus

Bodies hunt for space
And armpits smell so evil
I'm going to kill

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 31, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Went out to visit a friend tonight and did almost my usual journey back from work but had to change lines a bit earlier than normal. It's terrible how much on auto pilot I was, as even though I was standing uncomfortably and hot in a crush on the tube, (rather than reading a book in relative comfort) I virtually let the stop sail past me and then had to quickly force my way through people dozily to get off at the stop at the right time.

As I got off at South Ken, one of those station announcers was there with his little baton, that looks like a table tennis bat, waving the train on and he'd drawn a little smiley face on his baton. Except it was a downturned smiley face. I wonder if this was to signify the heat on the tube, or whether his smiley faces are always downturned because of where he works.



Don't you just love photoshop, even I can do a good artist's impression!

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 31, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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This blog's a Guardian Top Blog

Hoorah, thanks to the people at The Guardian newspaper's website for choosing my blog as their "top blog" today. They said
Going Underground's blog
Blog pick: Notwithstanding Guardian Unlimited weblog's non-London-centric stance, this blog on the delights of travelling on the London Underground is well worth a visit. Scroll down for the picture of the Japanese subway sign instructing men not to sit with their legs splayed.

Kewell - so if you've come here from there, so to speak, please read on.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, July 29, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Normal Londoner suspicion alert

This poor man asked me the time when coming down the escalator today. So I told him. He then started saying how hot it was. Yes I agreed. Mmm he thinks, she's talking to me. "It reminds me of my home town" Now I could simply ignore him as he was a bit smelly and had that sad, lonely, 'I want to make friends with complete strangers' air about him. So rather than being rude or mad enough to reply "Oh really, where's your home town?" I simply nodded with a non eye contact movement, trying to say "Go away I'm really not interested in talking to you and you smell and you're getting a bit too familiar matey back off". When we got off the bottom of the escalator he held back a bit as though he was going to walk with me. So I held back too and fortunately we were getting on different trains.

Now any non Londoner reading this will be thinking, "You sad cow he was only trying to make conversation, he wasn't an axe murderer". Any Londoner would be thinking - "Good move love, he was probably only after your purse or he might have talked loudly to you on the tube and stalked you all the way home".

Would you strike up a conversation with this man below?



Of course not - check out the full story and thanks to DC in the comments for reminding me.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, July 29, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Northern Line Sucks

Why is it that whenever I get the Northern Line (which thankfully is rarely) and I think it's going to Morden or Totteridge and Whetstone or wherever and it always seems to stop at Finchley or somewhere tantalisingly three or four stops from wherever I need. Do people who live at the end of this line, know that they will never get an uninterrupted journey to their home? Is it like the District Line which certainly runs more trains to Ealing Broadway than Richmond, whatever the deluded people at London Underground or deluded friends of mine who live in Ealing think?

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, July 25, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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More London Underground Tube Haikus

Crikey what a response to yesterday's entry. I knew we would give Metro newspaper a run for their money. Jag has come up with some crackers and my favourites of his are below:



When you feel unwell
Leave train at the next station
Curl up on platform

Hammersmith station
Grey pigeons on vacation
From every nation

Check out Jag's picture of a pigeon on the tube or my page on Pigeon Commuters for more of this.


Go to Hell and back.
Via Bank. But don't get off there!
Morden is grimmer.

Stanmore: 5 mins says
dot matrix indicator.
5 mins later: Same.

And an excellent contender from Kuad:

Let people out first
Not "charge through the doors first thing"!
Die, you bastards, die.

I think that's influenced by our cheerful drivers' announcements on the tube.

Keep them coming in through the comments link and I'll post more of Jag's up later to illustrate common tube experiences.

In case anyone is interested, here's the Metro one that started off the whole thing:

Ah, the train-sleeper
He dreams on in half light
that carried him in

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 24, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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London Underground Haiku's

Metro newspaper was all excited for the last month or so as they'd asked for haikus about the tube and they got one about someone falling asleep, then someone followed it up and then they asked people to follow on and got about eight haikus on the same theme (considering how many hundreds of thousands of people read Metro each day, that's a pretty poor show).

So I thought surely we can do better and I want to try to collect (shouting Sun newspaper style) THE DEFINITIVE London Underground haiku list. So to remind us all about haiku's they are a 17-syllable verse form consisting of three lines of 5, 7, and 5 syllables. I also quite like this quote about them:

"The importance of the poet's first impression, just as it was, of subjects taken from daily life, and of local colour to create freshness. Some of the most thrilling Haiku-poems describe daily situations in a way that gives the reader a brand new experience of a well-known situation." Which sort of sums up what blogs are about really - if you (sometimes) take off the poetic element.

I'm sure this will drive me mad and I'm not promising a haiku everyday, but now that the comments box is up and running, perhaps visitors to this blog could offer/write some too.

So here's my first:


A quick fix for air
In this tunnel of hot breath
Is sought by Mayor Ken


Easy, peasy! Fits the form, is topical and not bad for a first shot.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 24, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Semi Nutter

I feel really bad saying this about the guy, but I'll say it anyway, but I was sitting next to a man talking to himself on the tube today. Fortunately he didn't turn out to be a real nutter, cos he moved from talking to himself, to singing (not that loudly thank God), to whistling under his breath, to complete silence like the rest of the carriage. That was a great relief. My worst experience of the tube loon to date has been a man talking to me quite sensibly at first, then really going off in a major rant how everyone on the carriage was racist and how we should all stick together and doing that "You looking at me" Robert DeNiro mad shout at anyone who glanced in his direction. I had to move carriages after two stops of this as I was getting just a tad scared.

NEW COMMENTS TOOL

Today I added a comments tool to the blog, so if you want to comment or get on your soap box about any post feel free.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, July 22, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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MY SECOND RADIO INTERVIEW

Any of you living in Suffolk listening to BBC Radio Suffolk may hopefully have heard my dulcet tones today at 3.45 when I had a five minute interview with Rachel Sloane as Going Underground is their website of the day.

Stupidly, I had originally forgot to ask them to record it advance - the BBC don't store recordings, so I thought yet again I've not got a recording, but help was at hand. My first radio interview was with BBC Radio London - slightly larger audience I'd imagine - where I was walking around with a journalist on the tube and commenting as we struggled with the rush hour at Victoria station. Ironically we had to wait quite a while till they closed the gates to get on the tube (something they do everyday to prevent platforms being overcrowded) but that was very strange talking into a big microphone on a crowded carriage and trying to get other passenger to join in.

Today's interview was much more relaxing - on my mobile phone sitting in the corridor outside my office. I was delighted to find out that Nik Fox (who bought us the audio london underground driver's announcements in yesterday's entry) had driven to a high spot in London and managed to pick up Radio Suffolk and kindly recorded the interview for me - so here it is - Hoorah!!!

Very long download if you're not on broadband, so make yourself and Wembley Stadium a cup of tea or read War and Peace or something, while you're waiting.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, July 21, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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STOP PRESS TOP DRIVER'S ANNOUNCEMENTS

Nik Fox recorded a really funny London Underground driver who was clearly either on drugs, or delirously happy, or both. It's a classic, he talks about people getting on board the tube with ironing boards, and how every man on the carriage should stand up for any Mum as it's Mother's Day tomorrow.

You can hear the driver here

Cheers Nik.


STOP PRESS AGAIN (busy day)

To anyone living in Suffolk I'm going to be interviewed on BBC Radio Suffolk on Monday at 15.45 when www.goingunderground.net will (hopefully) be their website of the day. I hope the interviewer is someone like Alan Partridge from Radio Norwich (slapped wrist.....stop being such a city chick).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, July 18, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Was sitting opposite a woman with the strangest piece of jewellery on today. It was a ring that was attached to her bracelet by a small chain on the outside of her hand. Quite pretty items separately, but together most bizarre.

Those Highland Spring girls were out in full force today, handing out bottles of free water at the Piccadilly Circus exit. If you're not in London - let's have a quick weather check - hmmmm - it's cold, I've got a cardigan on, it's grey and drizzling. A few hot days in London and the city goes mad and Ken does his "let's get a reward for air conditioning on the tube as it's soooooo hot", and then the weather turns pants.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, July 18, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Clearly air conditioning on the tube and the reward has struck a chord (despite the fact it's currently wet, grey and miserable and not particularly warm in London). Several hits to this blog as a result of people searching and in today's Metro a very good letter response to Mayor Ken Livingstone's reward:

"I gather than Ken Livingstone has offered a reward of �100,000 to the person who invents a successful air conditioning system for the Underground. As one of the unfortunate cattle-class who has to battle through these radiator pipes every day, here's my idea: more trains, fewer people per train. This will mean fewer people standing on baking platforms and less Tube rage. And less time spent meditating in someone else's armpit. So do I get the �100,000?"
Lucy Johnston from London WC1

This slightly echoes my earlier posting, if the tube were doing their job properly in the first place Sheriff Ken, shouldn't have to be offering "rewards" for something that someone in the last hundred years of tube travel should have worked out by now.

The BBC have also got people to come up with some excellent suggestions as to how the tube should be cooled down - some complete with images:



* Replace those tired old tracks and trains with canals and gondolas. The cool water and slow pace of travel will make it much more pleasant.

* Equip all passengers with personal breathing apparatus and flood the tunnels using water from ye mighty Thames.

* Using cooling colours like deep blues and whites would create the impression of cool. Painting the walls and installing drinking fountains would help.

* Providing all passengers with free ice lollies.

* Getting a frozen pea company to sponsor the tubes with giant packs of frozen peas stuck to the outside of trains.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 17, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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New Scientist magazine discovers GoingUnderground.net

First Capital Radio, then FHM, then Bizarre magazine, and now The New Scientist (19th July issue) have discovered the joys of the drivers announcements recorded on my main site.

FEEDBACK recently came across the Going Underground website - the "fun London Underground guide" at www.going-underground.com. As we regularly travel on the tube, we particularly enjoyed the page of quotes from tube drivers and station announcers.

They then go on to quote their favourites, one of which is the one that started the whole thing off that I heard at Earl's Court and I really don't think is that funny anymore:

"there are times when passengers must wonder if they are in entirely in safe hands. At Earl's Court, the station PA declared: "The train at platform three is not going to Parsons Green but to Richmond. The train approaching platform two is also not going to Parsons Green but to Ealing Broadway. These trains are not going to Parsons Green despite what the signalmen think."

Anyway there are loads more, so enjoy.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, July 16, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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29 degrees on the tube and hotter than transporting cattle screamed the headline on the Evening Standard who were bursting with tube news today. It's the day the Americans take over the tube in the shape of Bob Kiley and Tim O'Toole - the new bloke who's taking over from Paul Godier.

Well I didn't notice any difference on day one. I was lucky as I mentioned yesterday to travel to somewhere near the North Pole this morning (Whetstone and Totteridge or Totteridge and Whetstone), which is so far North of where I live it is not true. I used the Silverlink for most of the journey and it all started to go wrong (surprise, surprise) when I boarded the northern Line. The train wasn't going to the end of the earth like it had displayed but stopped unexpectedly about four stops from Totterstone and Whetbridge. So I got off met my colleague who unbeknown to me was on the same train - and we waited about ten minutes for the train to arrive.

Going back into Piccadilly Circus took close on an hour, but it was lunchtime and fortunately the train was not packed and also fortunately it stopped for great lengths of time with it's doors open at stations. This wasn't a form of air conditioning or great kindness on the part of the drivers but simply normal Northern Line rubbish service.

(BLIMEY Ken Livingstone is offering a reward of �100,000 to anyone who can air condition the tube - a reward mate, they ought to get a knighthood. But also Ken, isn't this simply part of London Underground's job. Over 100 years of the tube and it's still not air conditioned. Hello, but hasn't someone thought this was a problem in the past thousands and thousands of times and shouldn't people being paid to invent something rather than turning it into a Lottery style fiasco or prize draw dumbing down milarky)

I thank my lucky stars that I do not have to do a journey like that Totteridge and Whetstone to ....anyhere, every day. It makes my Kew to Piccadilly journey seem like a walk in the park - but a park that's full of people with luggage, rucksacks, discarded copies of Metro and blokes sitting on benches with their legs wide apart.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Wednesday, July 16, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Possibly the hottest day of the year today and had the pleasure of going down the Piccadilly Circus escalator behind a man who had a perfectly shaped rucksack sweat "mark"/transfer, not sure what to call it, on his back. Eewww - it was foul. Which sort of ties in with my mood today.

Oh well, tomorrow I face the delights of an morning meeting on the penultimate stop of the Nothern Line which will probably take me half a day to reach from Kew. What fun.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, July 14, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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At the bottom of the Piccadilly Line exit's escalator at Piccadilly Circus, saw a man very kindly giving instructions to a oriental looking tourist. It involved much arm waving and pointing at maps. I'm not sure how great the oriental man's English was hence the "air traffic controller" style arm movements.

I often have to give people directions when I arrive at or leave Kew Gardens station as it's a major tourist attraction. I feel that I ought to get some money off my poll tax for this public service. I certainly don't subscribe to the rather weird "Urban Interventions" seen in the delightfully diverting "Smoke" - a London peculiar magazine:

Urban Intervention No.5
When a tourist next asks you for direction insist on personally taking them to their destination, even if this involves catching a bus or taking the Tube

Urban Intervention No.6
If you are asked for directions and are unable to help, conisder recommending an alternative destination that you would find equally interesting

Many thanks to Diamond Geezer by the way for bringing Smoke to my attention.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, July 11, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Got rather trashed last night and had to put the auto tube pilot into gear. Got on at Leicester Square at about five to minight, then fell asleep. Did my auto wake up at Turnham Green and amazingly the next District Line was going to Richmond. I've lost count of the times I have sat at Turnham Green late at night, wanting to get home, normally wanting to go to sleep or go the loo, and loads and loads of Ealing Broadway trains have come along. (I'm sure anyone living in Ealing reading this will think I'm mad and will say there are more Richmond bound ones......they are WRONG)

Fell asleep again and luckily the auto pilot kicked in again at Kew Gardens where I fell out.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Thursday, July 10, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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So glad that Wimbledon is over as it was playing havoc with the soap TV schedules. Not glad to see that Ariel washing powder who seem to sponsor Tim Henman's whites, have taken it upon their heads to sponsor whole District Line carriages with their ads above people's heads. This is a tad montonous and when you look at them you think; "Mmm yes, we see" I wonder how long they'll be up in the carriages, as the bright green is playing havoc with my eye sight.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Monday, July 07, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Helping my friend do research for her book at the moment and a becoming obsessed with watching men on the tube sitting with their legs wide apart. If someone can please tell me why you do this? Is it genetic. The Cartoonist sent me this excellent sticker from the Japanese subway where men are simply told not to do it.



And a couple of days ago Metro had the following cartoon.



So guys it's not big or clever (well it is big I spose), but it makes you look really sad.

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Friday, July 04, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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Hideous morning - got to Hammersmith where I normally change onto the Piccadilly Line to find it was about four people deep in folks waiting to get onto the VERY delayed Piccadilly Line. So I thinks it's best to stay put and take the District Line train that I was on - which constantly stops between stops - Embankment and change there onto the Bakerloo.....sorry YAWN, YAWN...boring travel story alert. STOP.

What was annoying about this was that it illustrates that tube sods law in that when you are delayed you will always make the wrong decision. I'm absolutely positive I'd have got into work faster had I waited for about four full Piccalilly Line trains to pass rather than to have got the Fish and Parcels Line (do not ask - I have no idea why the District Line is nicknamed the Fish and Parcels Line - particularly as I seem to be the only person I know who knows this).

London Underground; Tube Posted by annie mole Tuesday, July 01, 2003 Permalink COMMENT HERE
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